The Hurkyferd Prettacy

An ISBI Prettacy

Chapter 0.8 – The Awkward Ride Home

12 Comments

Hiya 🙂  Welcome back to the Hurkyferd Prettacy.  We left our little growing family last time as they just finished celebrating Gus’ toddler birthday, Opus stepped out on the town to try and gain some celebrity points and our loving couple mended fences in the form of another pregnancy!

———-

It is a great day for the oldest of the Hurkyferd children!

Uli:  “Me bwow out fire!”

Aw, I’m going to miss your sweet toddler face little Uli!  You won me over ❤

Gertrude:  “That’s my girl!  Go on and grow up so mama can start putting you in pageants!  We’ll get you on ‘Toddlers n Tiaras’ in no time flat!”

Ugh, that awful show?  No way!  besides, what if she doesn’t want to be in pageants?  That isn’t always the healthiest thing for a young girl anyway.

Gertie:  “Nonsense.  Besides, she can win lots of sparkly crowns and sashes!”

How about just putting the thousands of Simoleons you’ll spend on gowns and entry fees in a nice college or house fund for Uli instead?  Seems like that would be much more helpful to her when she hits YA than a room full of cheap plastic crowns and trophies?

Gertie:  “I *will * get on Toddlers and Tiaras.  I must – er, I mean Uli must be noticed!’

SMH.

Uli:  “Derp!”  *spins in birthday twinkles*

Let’s see those Hurkyferd genes, babydoll!

Uli:  “Dag dag!”

Wow.  She is a total clone of Gertrude, except for the skin tone and hair color.  Poor thing  😦  She was such a good little toddler, I feel bad for giving her these crazy genes!

Uli:  *still Derping it up*  “Yeah!  Now I can go to school! 

Why is she so excited for school?

Uli:  “Because I am so smart, my dad told me so!”

Yep, she gained the Genius trait 🙂  Hopefully that makes for some honor rolls going on! Points for me!

———-

After the celebration, things go back to normal.

Gertie:  *Bangs hammer on toilet*  “I’m upgrading this dern thing if it is the last thing I do!”

Good idea.  We can use some things that don’t break everyday.  I must admit, though – you’re getting mighty handy, Gertie!

Gertie: “Of course!  I AM multi-talented!”

I wish I could just bang a hammer on a toilet and have to never clean or fix it ever again.

Gertie:  “By the way, I want a new house.  Things are getting cramped up in here!” *diva pout*

Yeah, well with almost 5 Sims in a ONE bedroom house, I would imagine it is getting a little like a clown car in there.  But we only have like 1500 Simoleons, so you’re going to be there for a while yet.

———-

Then this happens…

Ukelele:  “ZOMG!  I’m alive!  They finally took me out of that stupid backpack!”  *spins in the twinklies*

Um, yay?  Listen – let’s keep the distractions to a minimum, k?

Ukelele:  “Wow, I forgot I’m on a reality show!  Cool!

Yeah, no one can see you except Uli.

Ukelele:  “But you can see me.”

*narrows eyes*  True, but that’s cause I am the all-knowing player – I mean Producer/Show Runner.  I see all!

Ukelele:  “I can’t make any promises.  I mean, for one I am only a kid.  And for two, I just became REAL!”  *parties*

Just leave Uli alone when she’s in the bathroom and let her get her homework done before you play, ok?

Ukelele:*plugs ears*  “La lalalalalala la…I can’t hear you…Lalalalalala”

Ay-yi-yi!

———-

Later that night.

Ukelele:  “Hi Uli!  I’m growed up like you!”

Uli:  “Holy meatballs!  Ukelele – you’re real!”

Ukelele:  “Yup.  But its a super-duper secret!  The only one who can see me is you!  Oh, and that grumpy reality-show lady”

Hey!  I’m not that grumpy.

Uli:  “This is awesome!  My very own Imaginary Friend! Now I have someone to play with who won’t drool all over my toys!”

We do need to get Opus a retainer, don’t we?  I kid, I kid.  I know she means little Gus.

Ukelele:  “Lets play tag!”

Gah!  Its almost 1o o’clock and Uli’s exhausted.  This IF is going to cause me points, I just know it.

———

Who is this strange boy, and why is he holding little Gus?

Freddie Riddle:  “Ok Gus, it’s time for night-night.  Just think, when you wake up tomorrow, you’ll have a new little baby sister or brother!’

Gertie:  *off screen*  “Sister!  He’s going to have a sister!  OWWWWW…oh balls, I forgot how bad labor hurrrrrrrrts!”

Well, if 12 watermelons are right then, yes he will have a sister.  Now get in the car and go bring us another potential heir!

Freddie Riddle: *pats Gus on head*  “Goodnight, buddy, if you need anything. I’ll be in the next room.”

Wow.  Color me STUNNED. A Sims babysitter who takes care of the kids!  He walked right in and scooped little Gus up, changed his diaper and put him to bed!  It’s a miracle!!!  *cries*

———-

Poor Gertie JUST makes it to the hospital in time.

Gertie:  “I may never eat another watermelon as long as I live”  *has orange Plumbob*  “It didn’t work in case you haven’t guessed.” *glitches baby through chest*

Who is that you have there!  A new baby boy! *curses watermelons*

Gertie:  “Yes.  His name is Atticus and he really seems to be happy out here.  He must Love the Outdoors.  He’s also a sweet little thing.  I think he’s gonna be real Friendly when he is able to talk and stuff.”

Don’t sound so excited there, Gertrude.  You can’t blame him for being a boy.  And if you do, you’ll be looking at yet another child of yours that’s going to have their therapist on speed-dial.

Gertie: “Oh, I love him and all.  I just kept hoping for a girl.  I have a feeling Uli isn’t going to like the whole ‘pageant’ thing.  I need one I can start early this time. Get her into makeup and hairspray right away.  Like 3-4 months old.  Then I’ll make it on Toddlers and Tiaras for sure.”  *sighs*

Nice priorities there, Gert.  I think you need some rest, dear.  Go on home, now.

———-

Gertie, as you can tell, is yet again in a foul mood after giving birth.  Last time Opus didn’t make it in the hospital.  This time he isn’t coming out for some reason.  Gah!  Glitches….

Gertie: “Where’s that man I married”.  *Grumble grumble*   “Where’s the cab?”

Opus: “You think SOMEONE might have taken time to notice I was stuck in the hospital.  I don’t know what happened!  Its like suddenly the building turned into a giant labyrinth.  Hallways let to more hallways.  Then every time I got near the door, it started to disappear! The whole building seemed to fade away! It was the strangest thing.”  *trembles*

Hmm….that sounds vaguely familiar….but maybe not.  Lets just say maybe the nurses gave YOU some pain medicine right along with Gertie?

Opus:  “I – I just don’t know.”

I think you best be getting on home. You two are both tired and starving!  Let’s blame it on exhaustion.  All the celebrities do!

———-

Meanwhile, back at the homestead.

Freddie Riddle:  “It tickles!’

What in the world is that crawling up your back? What are you doing in the backyard?

Ah ha!

Freddie Riddle:  “Oh man, I just started this up and now I sense the parental units coming home.  *spins in air and changes back*

I knew you were too good to be true!  I KNEW it!

Freddie Riddle:  “Whatever.  I’ll take my $50 now.  Bye!!”  *runs off*

———-

Opus and Gertie are making the Awkward ride home.

Gertie:  “We’ll have to use that babysitter again, Opus. I liked him. And you know I’m a good judge of character.”  *sighs*  “Boy my back aches”

I bet it does!  Off to bed with you when you get home.

Opus:  *I wonder if she’d make me a steak dinner if I asked right now?*

Opus, my man.  You are NOT good at this childbirth thing, bless your heart!  Remember, smile and nod.  And for Plumbob sake, don’t ask her to do anything for a couple of days!!

———-

Let’s check in our newest Hurkyferd!

Atticus:  *coos*

Aw, there all so cute at this age.  If you get past the creepy cocoon body.  He doesn’t look like he has Opus’ washed-out skin.  I think I see Gertrude’s eyes.  We won’t know anything until toddler, anyway.

———-

The next morning…the fun begins.

Uli:  “Ukelele!  I’m going to go potty!  You can’t be in here right now!”

Grr….

Ukelele:  *leaves*

Two minutes later…

Uli:  “Ukelele!  I need to take a shower!”

Ukelele: “So?”

Uli:  “You can’t be in here then, either!”

Ukelele:  “But I’m imaginary!”

Uli: “Well, I’m not!”

Ukelele:  “Ohhhh!” *pauses*   “Wanna play tag?”

Uli:  “Sure!”

*le sigh*  At least she went to the bathroom, right?

———-

Meanwhile, outside.

Opus: “You can do it, buddy!  Just a few more steps and you’ll be walking!”

Gertie:  “What’s that over in the neighbor’s yard?”

Gertie!  Your oldest son is taking his first steps RIGHT beside you?  What could possibly be more important that that?

Gertie:  *squints*  I think it might be a meteor!

Go!  Go grab them…we can so use the Simoleons!  XD  What?  I need a new house for these poor crowded Sims!

———-

Gus is looking like he’s walked into a wall of royal stench in the bedroom.

Opus:  *plugs nose*  “Oh my hairy eyeball, what crawled up in the wall and died in here?”

I don’t know.

Opus:  “Smells like the time Mamaw  Grady made that pickled roadkill stew.”

I – I don’t even want to know.

Opus:  “No, no!  You misunderstand!  It smells like an armpit but it tastes like heaven!’

If by heaven you mean poopy? Then yes, I believe you.

———-

Uli and Ukelele continue to avoid hygiene and goof off like kids should.

Uli:  “And the little girl found the doll in the basement of the old, abandoned house.”

Ukelele:  “No!  But I thought they had burned it 100 years ago!”  *shivers*

Opus:  “Good gravy, what is that smell?”

Uli:  *oblivious to stench*  “The little girl was scared but she took the hammer and smashed the evil doll into a thousand pieces!”

Giant Floating Face:  “OMG, what stinks in here?”

Opus: “I might throw up.  This is awful”    *realizes what stinks*

Uli: “The little girl went home, still a little scared, but glad she’d had the nerve to destroy the doll that had torn her family apart for generations!”

Opus:  “Uli – when is the last time you took a bath, kiddo?  *gags*

Uli:  That night she fell asleep with ease for the first time in months.”

Okay, story over now go to take a shower!

Uli:  *ignores*   “But later, she awoke in the middle of the night, scared for a moment until she remembered the doll was gone.  Her mom was sitting on the edge of the bed.  The little girl sat up and smiled.”

UlI:  “Then her mom turned to her and the little girl gasped! For she held the doll in her arms!  And she said…’All Hail the Doll”

Ukelele:  *terrified*  “Ahhhhhh!!!!”

Uli:  *laughs*

Ukelele: “I don’t know what’s scarier. The doll or the green fumes rising off your clothes!”  *giggles*

Uli:  *pouts*  “You’re the one that woulnd’t let me take a bath!

Ukelele:  “I’m not stopping you now!”

———-

Opus hears little Atticus crying and happily goes to change him.

Opus: “Oh Atticus.  Even your dirty diaper smelled better than Uli.”

Atticus:  *coos*

Opus:  “By the way, you got this strange doll in the mail from some woman named Aunt Bertha….”

Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhh!!!!!  Another IF!  Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…..

🙂

———–

We’ll wrap up here in the midst of my IF tragedy.  Next time – will we see any more of the Hurkyferd genes popping out?  Will there be more babies?  How will they all fit in their one bedroom house?  Come on back and find out!  Thank you for reading, I truly appreciate it. And if you’d like to, please leave a note!

———-

Points:

Babies Born: 3 = 15 points

Total Points = 15

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12 thoughts on “Chapter 0.8 – The Awkward Ride Home

  1. 2 IF’s! Yipes!! Great post, though. Sorry you didn’t get a girl.

  2. Love it! XD

  3. Uli is still adorable despite the smell. 😀

  4. Great post! I cant wait to see atticus! I hope he is not a clone. Btw don’t waste money on apples and watermelons. That doesn’t work anymore.

  5. So glad you update frequently! I really like this legacy!

  6. Aww I’m sad there’s no more to read but I caught up! Woot woot!

  7. Uli is a lovely thing, lol. That picture of her with the flashlight scared me far more than her doll or her story did. :O

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