The Hurkyferd Prettacy

An ISBI Prettacy


Chapter 0.9 – Torture Math

Chapter 0.9 of the Hurkyferd Prettacy is on tap!  To review where we were last time – Uli had her childhood birthday as did her IF Ukelele, Gus skilled some more and baby Atticus was born.


Another day in the Hurkyferd house.  Opus comes home from work and makes a beeline for little Gus.  Since Gertrude spends so much time in the garden these days, I’ve made a little skill area off to the side for the kids with the Toddler skill books and toys, as well as a little potty.

Opus:  “How’s my little man?”

Gus:  “Me hewp mama in garden!”

Yeah, I’m not sure why Gus is skilling in that picture, or what he is skilling on?  As far as I know Toddlers don’t skill from being held but okay.

Opus: “You’re getting so big Gus!  Soon Daddy won’t be able to hold you!”

Could that be foreshadowing??  Dun dun duuuunnnnn! Seriously, though, Opus is an amazing father.  He is full of autonomous actions for his kids.  Its very sweet.


Gertie wraps up a marathon gardening session.  (BTW, that is the Creeper House in the background – see the giant Robot in the backyard?  If you have Starlight Shores, go check it out – inside and outside.  I wasn’t kidding – it is creeeeeeeepy!)

Gertrude:  “So I was thinking, I’m not so worried about my Lifetime Wish anymore.  Can I pleeeeassse quit my job?”

You still have a job?

Gertie:  “Of course I do!  I’m still upset about that awful skully cap I have to wear.  It ruins my bump.”

Its been so long since Gertie’s been to work, I totally and completely forgot she even *had* a job.  But no, Gertie, you can’t quit. We need that 100 Simoleons of maternity pay I obviously ignored the pop-ups for – most certainly if you guys are going to move ANYTIME soon.

Gertie:  “You know, I really should be living in one of those mansions up in the Starlight Shores Hills.”  *sighs*

We should all be Gertie, we *all* should be.


Uli continues to be the child I love the most of any Sim child I’ve ever had.

Yes!  A child that autonomously cleans!

Uli: “Mr. Plate needs to be washed.  Did you know the chemical compounds in the dish soap break down the binding agents of the rendered fat from the shortening in the cake frosting, therefore causing them to dissolve?  However -“

*Headspin*   She’s a smart little cookie, too!  Now lets see if she can figure out how to GET IN THE FLIPPIN’ SHOWER!  She still hasn’t taken a shower.  Notice the green cloud still hovering around her.



Gertrude is doing a great job with little Atticus.  In fact, he is the only baby so far that she rolls daily wants for.  Cuddling, etc – she’s all about the Nooboo.

Gertie:  “Aww, I’m sorry I wished you were a little girl, Atticus.  Now be a big boy and drink your Mountain Dew!”

Hey – babies shouldn’t be drinking soda!

Gertie: “I know, I’m joking.  Although  – can you stop the Plumbob camera for a minute now?”

Suuuuuure.  *crosses fingers behind back* Its off.  Go on.

Gertie:  “If I wasn’t on this here reality show, I wouldn’t hesitate to use my mama’s ways.  You know, she used to put coffee in our bottles to keep us up during the day so we’d sleep at night.  And we started drinking pop real early.  And we all turned out just fine.  So, don’t be giving me lectures on what to give babies.”  *tosses hair*  “Why I was eating fried steak and 6 eggs every day for breakfast before I even said my first word. “


Gertie:  “What?  I was born with all my teeth!  Doc Turner said he’d never seen nothing like it!”

Gertie, there is no one like you in the world, I just know it.

Gertie:  “Perfection is a rarity, you know.”

Oh yes, you go girl!


Ukelele continues to make things hard for me, although Uli loves it.

Ukelele:  “I know its almost 11 PM on a school night, but I’ve been thinking that we haven’t spent enough time together.”

Uli:  “I know!  10 hours of tag just isn’t enough!  I’m so glad I have you, Ukelele.  My dad is so busy with work and my mom with the babies and her garden.”

Yes, I am glad Uli has Ukelele for her social, too.  HOWEVER, school starts tomorrow and I’m serious about Uli getting her homework done, now.  We don’t want to see the Social Worker for failing grades.


Fast forward to 12:30 AM….

Uli:  “Phew!  I gotta catch my breath.”  *pants*  You got me that time Ukelele!”

Ukelele:  “You’re it!”

Uli: “I guess.”  *yawns*  “I’m so tried.  You think maybe we should go to bed?  I do need to go to school in the morning.”

Ukelele:  “Okay, maybe we should go in the house, then.”


Ukelele:  “And have a pillow fight!”  *runs off*  “Last one inside is a dirty egg!”



Gertie finishes up a midnight feeding for baby Atticus and realizes Uli isn’t in the kid’s room.

Gertie:  “Uli!  Its almost 1 in the morning!  Get on in the house and go to bed.  And who in the world were you talking to?”  *gets paranoid*  “It wasn’t the trees or someone who looked like a llama, was it?”

Uli:  *giggles*  “No, mama.  It was just my Imaginary Friend, Ukelele!” *pulls out doll*  “See?  He’s right here.”

Gertie: “Uli, that’s just that weird looking doll Opus’ great-great Aunt Bertha sent for you when you were born.  Now, stop this silliness and come in in the house!”

Uli:  “No mama, Ukelele is REAL.”  *pouts*  “This is just his doll form.”  *puts doll on ground*

Ukelele:  *pops into air*  “We pillow fighting now?”

Gertie:  “Uli May Hurkyferd.  You stop this foolishness right now.”

Uli:  “Well, maybe if you and dad spent more time with my, I wouldn’t have to have an Imaginary Friend”

Ukelele:  “Hey, I’m real, hello?  Remember me?  We were going to pillow fight?”

Gertie:  “Oh, Uli.  Mama’s sorry if you are lonely.”  *hugs*  “You’re my specail little girl, you know that?”

Uli:  *hugs*  “Thank you mommy, I love you!”

Gertie:  “Enough to let mama sign you up for the Girlz Glamour-n-Glitz pageant next weekend in Bridgeport?”

Gertie!  Way to ruin a tender moment there.

Uli:  “Aw, mama I hate all that stuff.”


The next morning Gertie has a breakdown.

Gertie: “OMG, my little girl is all grown up!  I can’t believe she is already going to school!”

She sure is, but I don’t think you’ll have anything to worry about. She is a smart as they come.

Gertie: “No, you don’t understand.  I’m talking about ME!”  *hyperventilating*  “All my babies are going to start getting big.”

Yes, that is what happens.  Not sure where you’re going with this…

Gertie:  “Duh!  Wrinkles!  This beautiful, tan gorgeous skin – ruined by wrinkles and saggy bits and urgh.  I think I am going to be sick!”

SMH.  Gertie, we all get older.  There’s not much we can do about it.  Embrace it!  Besides, you haven’t even had your Adult birthday yet.  Relax before you whip yourself into a Joan Rivers-like frenzy and end up with your face pulled so tight you need someone to slap you in the back of the head to blink.

Gertie: “I think I need to get some more sun to make myself feel better.”

I’m not even going to say anything.


I go to check on our little school girl and find this.  Of course!

Uli:  “Ooooof”

Ukelele: “Gotcha!  Let’s see if we can beat our record and play tag for 11 hours today!

Uli:  “Haha Ukelele.  But I can’t today.  I have school!”

Ukelele:  “Do you have to go?”

YES she does.  Now leave the child alone so she can get ready.


I forgot to introduce our newest Hurkyferd!

Nope, not a baby.  Did I fool you for 2 seconds?

Meet Ulyssa Hurkyferd!  Gertie found her while out on one of her meteor/gem/rock/seed seeking missions.  Since I don’t have Pets, I figured this would have to do for now.

Ulyssa:  “What’s that supposed to mean?  Sorry if I’m not a cute little puppy or a bouncy little kitten.  If you didn’t want me then you could have done what you should have done – which is leave me to live my life in the wild.”

Wow.  I think Gertie caught herself a Diva Ladybug.  Perfect.


Uli tears herself away from pillow fighting in time to eat breakfast before school.  Sadly, I had to use Uli’s ONE child action I am allowed to cancel the pillow fight so she could refocus and eat.

She chose ice cream.

Uli:  “I like this!  I can have ice cream whenever I want!”

Grr…stupid ISBI…my poor little Uli is eating ice cream for breakfast because I can’t control her!  I don’t know if I’m going to make it through this whole thing without tearing my hair out!


While Gertie takes a shower, Opus spends some time with the children.

Opus:  OMG

Uli:  “Yummy yummy chocolate-y goodness!  BEST.BREAKFAST.EVER!”

Atticus:  “ZZzzzzzzzz”   *makes a poopy*

Gus:  *screams at top of lungs*  “I made a poooooooopyyyyyyyy!!!!!”

Opus:  “Oh good gravy, what do I do first?”

Well, since the baby is still asleep, and you can’t really do much about Uli, maybe Gus?

Opus:  “Shhhhushhh, Daddy loves his little Gus.”  *changes diaper*

Atticus:  *snores*

Gus:  “Me go play with Buddy, now?”

Yes.  I should mention this.  Funny the way things work, isn’t it?  When I got out Atticus’ new Invisible Friend, it appeared in his crib.  The next night when Opus and Gertie put the boys down to bed, suddenly an IF showed up in GUS’ BED TOO!!!!  WTH??

So, let’s take a tally, shall we?



3 Kids


3 Imaginary Friends =


ONE INSANE SIMMER!!!!  That’s what I call Torture Math.  *cries*


Gus:  “Me wike eat fingers!!”

No, buddy you’ll need those later on to do things like write and eat. Very useful things those fingers!

Gus:  “Me wike eat book!”

Another useful invention!  Keep up the autonomous skilling bud, you’re doing great!  He is!  I must say as toddlers go, he isn’t as calm as Uli as he likes to scream it up every once in a while, but he’s almost as good at skilling as Uli.  *almost*

As evening approaches, Gertie wraps up her gardening.  It is really progressing nicely!

Gertie:  “I decided to garden in my Formal Wear today.”

Yes, nothing like a pair of high heels sinking in the fertilizer to make one feel *fancy*.

Gertie:  “You know, anytime is the right time to wear a cocktail dress.  My Aunt Hettie taught me all about style.  She told me the only reason its called a cocktail dress is because when you put it on, it immediately becomes Happy Hour!”

Oh really?  I might like this Aunt Hettie.

Gertie:  “Yep.  As she always says ‘Its 5 o’clock somewhere'”

Gertie:  “Whew!  I’m all done.  Everybody say ‘hay-oh, hay-oh’ ”  *dances*

Thought Balloon Sunshine:  “Heeeellllpppp meeeee, I’m meeeeelllttiiinggg!!!”  *dies from stench of Gertie’s pits*

Might be time for a shower there, Gertrude.

Gertie:  “To be or not to be, that is the question…. See?  I know things.  I learned about Omlette in school.”

Maybe we should leave the acting to Opus?  He’s coming along a bit better these days.  He’s only getting one of the stress moodlets now!

Robot at Creeper Neighbor’s House:  *photobombs*


With that lovely image burned into your retinas, we’ll call it a wrap!  Next time – will we get to see baby Atticus’ genetics?  Will Gertie get her dream of a house that works?  Tune in next time to find out.  As always, thank you so much for following along with my goofy Sims.  And please feel free to leave me a message.  I appreciate every one I get!  See you next time 🙂



Babies Born: 3 = 15 points

Total Points = 15


Chapter 0.8 – The Awkward Ride Home

Hiya 🙂  Welcome back to the Hurkyferd Prettacy.  We left our little growing family last time as they just finished celebrating Gus’ toddler birthday, Opus stepped out on the town to try and gain some celebrity points and our loving couple mended fences in the form of another pregnancy!


It is a great day for the oldest of the Hurkyferd children!

Uli:  “Me bwow out fire!”

Aw, I’m going to miss your sweet toddler face little Uli!  You won me over ❤

Gertrude:  “That’s my girl!  Go on and grow up so mama can start putting you in pageants!  We’ll get you on ‘Toddlers n Tiaras’ in no time flat!”

Ugh, that awful show?  No way!  besides, what if she doesn’t want to be in pageants?  That isn’t always the healthiest thing for a young girl anyway.

Gertie:  “Nonsense.  Besides, she can win lots of sparkly crowns and sashes!”

How about just putting the thousands of Simoleons you’ll spend on gowns and entry fees in a nice college or house fund for Uli instead?  Seems like that would be much more helpful to her when she hits YA than a room full of cheap plastic crowns and trophies?

Gertie:  “I *will * get on Toddlers and Tiaras.  I must – er, I mean Uli must be noticed!’


Uli:  “Derp!”  *spins in birthday twinkles*

Let’s see those Hurkyferd genes, babydoll!

Uli:  “Dag dag!”

Wow.  She is a total clone of Gertrude, except for the skin tone and hair color.  Poor thing  😦  She was such a good little toddler, I feel bad for giving her these crazy genes!

Uli:  *still Derping it up*  “Yeah!  Now I can go to school! 

Why is she so excited for school?

Uli:  “Because I am so smart, my dad told me so!”

Yep, she gained the Genius trait 🙂  Hopefully that makes for some honor rolls going on! Points for me!


After the celebration, things go back to normal.

Gertie:  *Bangs hammer on toilet*  “I’m upgrading this dern thing if it is the last thing I do!”

Good idea.  We can use some things that don’t break everyday.  I must admit, though – you’re getting mighty handy, Gertie!

Gertie: “Of course!  I AM multi-talented!”

I wish I could just bang a hammer on a toilet and have to never clean or fix it ever again.

Gertie:  “By the way, I want a new house.  Things are getting cramped up in here!” *diva pout*

Yeah, well with almost 5 Sims in a ONE bedroom house, I would imagine it is getting a little like a clown car in there.  But we only have like 1500 Simoleons, so you’re going to be there for a while yet.


Then this happens…

Ukelele:  “ZOMG!  I’m alive!  They finally took me out of that stupid backpack!”  *spins in the twinklies*

Um, yay?  Listen – let’s keep the distractions to a minimum, k?

Ukelele:  “Wow, I forgot I’m on a reality show!  Cool!

Yeah, no one can see you except Uli.

Ukelele:  “But you can see me.”

*narrows eyes*  True, but that’s cause I am the all-knowing player – I mean Producer/Show Runner.  I see all!

Ukelele:  “I can’t make any promises.  I mean, for one I am only a kid.  And for two, I just became REAL!”  *parties*

Just leave Uli alone when she’s in the bathroom and let her get her homework done before you play, ok?

Ukelele:*plugs ears*  “La lalalalalala la…I can’t hear you…Lalalalalala”



Later that night.

Ukelele:  “Hi Uli!  I’m growed up like you!”

Uli:  “Holy meatballs!  Ukelele – you’re real!”

Ukelele:  “Yup.  But its a super-duper secret!  The only one who can see me is you!  Oh, and that grumpy reality-show lady”

Hey!  I’m not that grumpy.

Uli:  “This is awesome!  My very own Imaginary Friend! Now I have someone to play with who won’t drool all over my toys!”

We do need to get Opus a retainer, don’t we?  I kid, I kid.  I know she means little Gus.

Ukelele:  “Lets play tag!”

Gah!  Its almost 1o o’clock and Uli’s exhausted.  This IF is going to cause me points, I just know it.


Who is this strange boy, and why is he holding little Gus?

Freddie Riddle:  “Ok Gus, it’s time for night-night.  Just think, when you wake up tomorrow, you’ll have a new little baby sister or brother!’

Gertie:  *off screen*  “Sister!  He’s going to have a sister!  OWWWWW…oh balls, I forgot how bad labor hurrrrrrrrts!”

Well, if 12 watermelons are right then, yes he will have a sister.  Now get in the car and go bring us another potential heir!

Freddie Riddle: *pats Gus on head*  “Goodnight, buddy, if you need anything. I’ll be in the next room.”

Wow.  Color me STUNNED. A Sims babysitter who takes care of the kids!  He walked right in and scooped little Gus up, changed his diaper and put him to bed!  It’s a miracle!!!  *cries*


Poor Gertie JUST makes it to the hospital in time.

Gertie:  “I may never eat another watermelon as long as I live”  *has orange Plumbob*  “It didn’t work in case you haven’t guessed.” *glitches baby through chest*

Who is that you have there!  A new baby boy! *curses watermelons*

Gertie:  “Yes.  His name is Atticus and he really seems to be happy out here.  He must Love the Outdoors.  He’s also a sweet little thing.  I think he’s gonna be real Friendly when he is able to talk and stuff.”

Don’t sound so excited there, Gertrude.  You can’t blame him for being a boy.  And if you do, you’ll be looking at yet another child of yours that’s going to have their therapist on speed-dial.

Gertie: “Oh, I love him and all.  I just kept hoping for a girl.  I have a feeling Uli isn’t going to like the whole ‘pageant’ thing.  I need one I can start early this time. Get her into makeup and hairspray right away.  Like 3-4 months old.  Then I’ll make it on Toddlers and Tiaras for sure.”  *sighs*

Nice priorities there, Gert.  I think you need some rest, dear.  Go on home, now.


Gertie, as you can tell, is yet again in a foul mood after giving birth.  Last time Opus didn’t make it in the hospital.  This time he isn’t coming out for some reason.  Gah!  Glitches….

Gertie: “Where’s that man I married”.  *Grumble grumble*   “Where’s the cab?”

Opus: “You think SOMEONE might have taken time to notice I was stuck in the hospital.  I don’t know what happened!  Its like suddenly the building turned into a giant labyrinth.  Hallways let to more hallways.  Then every time I got near the door, it started to disappear! The whole building seemed to fade away! It was the strangest thing.”  *trembles*

Hmm….that sounds vaguely familiar….but maybe not.  Lets just say maybe the nurses gave YOU some pain medicine right along with Gertie?

Opus:  “I – I just don’t know.”

I think you best be getting on home. You two are both tired and starving!  Let’s blame it on exhaustion.  All the celebrities do!


Meanwhile, back at the homestead.

Freddie Riddle:  “It tickles!’

What in the world is that crawling up your back? What are you doing in the backyard?

Ah ha!

Freddie Riddle:  “Oh man, I just started this up and now I sense the parental units coming home.  *spins in air and changes back*

I knew you were too good to be true!  I KNEW it!

Freddie Riddle:  “Whatever.  I’ll take my $50 now.  Bye!!”  *runs off*


Opus and Gertie are making the Awkward ride home.

Gertie:  “We’ll have to use that babysitter again, Opus. I liked him. And you know I’m a good judge of character.”  *sighs*  “Boy my back aches”

I bet it does!  Off to bed with you when you get home.

Opus:  *I wonder if she’d make me a steak dinner if I asked right now?*

Opus, my man.  You are NOT good at this childbirth thing, bless your heart!  Remember, smile and nod.  And for Plumbob sake, don’t ask her to do anything for a couple of days!!


Let’s check in our newest Hurkyferd!

Atticus:  *coos*

Aw, there all so cute at this age.  If you get past the creepy cocoon body.  He doesn’t look like he has Opus’ washed-out skin.  I think I see Gertrude’s eyes.  We won’t know anything until toddler, anyway.


The next morning…the fun begins.

Uli:  “Ukelele!  I’m going to go potty!  You can’t be in here right now!”


Ukelele:  *leaves*

Two minutes later…

Uli:  “Ukelele!  I need to take a shower!”

Ukelele: “So?”

Uli:  “You can’t be in here then, either!”

Ukelele:  “But I’m imaginary!”

Uli: “Well, I’m not!”

Ukelele:  “Ohhhh!” *pauses*   “Wanna play tag?”

Uli:  “Sure!”

*le sigh*  At least she went to the bathroom, right?


Meanwhile, outside.

Opus: “You can do it, buddy!  Just a few more steps and you’ll be walking!”

Gertie:  “What’s that over in the neighbor’s yard?”

Gertie!  Your oldest son is taking his first steps RIGHT beside you?  What could possibly be more important that that?

Gertie:  *squints*  I think it might be a meteor!

Go!  Go grab them…we can so use the Simoleons!  XD  What?  I need a new house for these poor crowded Sims!


Gus is looking like he’s walked into a wall of royal stench in the bedroom.

Opus:  *plugs nose*  “Oh my hairy eyeball, what crawled up in the wall and died in here?”

I don’t know.

Opus:  “Smells like the time Mamaw  Grady made that pickled roadkill stew.”

I – I don’t even want to know.

Opus:  “No, no!  You misunderstand!  It smells like an armpit but it tastes like heaven!’

If by heaven you mean poopy? Then yes, I believe you.


Uli and Ukelele continue to avoid hygiene and goof off like kids should.

Uli:  “And the little girl found the doll in the basement of the old, abandoned house.”

Ukelele:  “No!  But I thought they had burned it 100 years ago!”  *shivers*

Opus:  “Good gravy, what is that smell?”

Uli:  *oblivious to stench*  “The little girl was scared but she took the hammer and smashed the evil doll into a thousand pieces!”

Giant Floating Face:  “OMG, what stinks in here?”

Opus: “I might throw up.  This is awful”    *realizes what stinks*

Uli: “The little girl went home, still a little scared, but glad she’d had the nerve to destroy the doll that had torn her family apart for generations!”

Opus:  “Uli – when is the last time you took a bath, kiddo?  *gags*

Uli:  That night she fell asleep with ease for the first time in months.”

Okay, story over now go to take a shower!

Uli:  *ignores*   “But later, she awoke in the middle of the night, scared for a moment until she remembered the doll was gone.  Her mom was sitting on the edge of the bed.  The little girl sat up and smiled.”

UlI:  “Then her mom turned to her and the little girl gasped! For she held the doll in her arms!  And she said…’All Hail the Doll”

Ukelele:  *terrified*  “Ahhhhhh!!!!”

Uli:  *laughs*

Ukelele: “I don’t know what’s scarier. The doll or the green fumes rising off your clothes!”  *giggles*

Uli:  *pouts*  “You’re the one that woulnd’t let me take a bath!

Ukelele:  “I’m not stopping you now!”


Opus hears little Atticus crying and happily goes to change him.

Opus: “Oh Atticus.  Even your dirty diaper smelled better than Uli.”

Atticus:  *coos*

Opus:  “By the way, you got this strange doll in the mail from some woman named Aunt Bertha….”

Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhh!!!!!  Another IF!  Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…..



We’ll wrap up here in the midst of my IF tragedy.  Next time – will we see any more of the Hurkyferd genes popping out?  Will there be more babies?  How will they all fit in their one bedroom house?  Come on back and find out!  Thank you for reading, I truly appreciate it. And if you’d like to, please leave a note!



Babies Born: 3 = 15 points

Total Points = 15


Chapter 0.7 – Therapy Bills

Welcome to a brand new Chapter/Episode of the Hurkyferd Prettacy.  Last time when we left Opus and Gertie, trouble was brewing after Gertrude gave birth to their new baby boy, Gus.


Gertie spends all her time in the garden these days, probably avoiding Opus.  Uli enjoys it, though. Oblivious to her parents fighting.  Instead, she plays with Ukelele and skills on her books and toys.

Uli:  “Me go potty wike a big girl!”

Yay for potty training!  And, this again shows why I love this child so much.  I can’t control her, yet she finds her own way to the potty!

Uli:  “Me do good?”

You always do good, sweet girl.

Best toddler, evah!


After spending the day and evening in the garden, Gertrude’s nights are filled with the children.

Gertrude:  “Bananas, jelly beans and cows!”

Uli:  “Nanas, jawwy beans and moo-moo cows!”

Gertie:  “That’s right, sweet thing.  Those are some of the things the Llama-people haven’t gotten their hands on yet!”

Uli:  “Yama people!”

Gertrude!  What are you teaching your child?  *tsk tsk*

Gertie: *Hrmph*  “Only THE most important things, of course.  Girl needs to know what evils lurk in the shadows.”

Uli:  “Evil shadows!”

Good thing she doesn’t have the Insane trait.  She may just grow up to know better!


The next day, Gertie is ranting around the house.

Gertrude:  “Where did this couch come from?”  *rages*

You’ve had it since the very beginning of the game – I mean show.  Since the beginning of the show.

Gertie: *balls fists*   “I SAID I HATE THIS COUCH!!!!!”

Whoa.  its a little early in the post/episode for so much anger.  Easy, tiger!  I guess she’s still in a bad mood.  No wonder Opus has been keeping a low profile!


Speaking of Opus, yet again days pass and no promotion even though he is skilled up in Charisma and is now BFFs with his direct supervisor, Anabelle Gooder.  I guess anyone who made it out of that party alive deserves a friendship, yes?

Opus:  “So, seeing as you’re a celebrity and I had to jump through hoops just to get you to let me talk to you, you think you could share your profession with me?”

Random Celebrity: *blank stare*  *runs off*

Background on this picture. I’ve been sending Opus out in the evenings a couple times a week to try and meet SOMEONE with Celebrity points.  There aren’t many which makes no sense to me,  Every other flippin’ save file I have, everyone in town is a darn Celebrity.  but when I finally NEED them, no one is.  GAH!

So this guy made Opus chase him all around the venue, then when Opus finally was allowed to talk to him, the guy cancelled Opus’ action and ran home. (!)

Opus:  “I think that sounds like a good idea.  I’m tired and stressed and I just want to see my kids”

😦  I don’t like when Opus and Gertrude fight!  Go home and make up with your wife, Opus!


Let’s take a break from the mess that is Opus and Gertie’s relationship, shall we?

Uli:  *toddler giggles*

Aw, Uli! What are you doing in there, silly girl?

Uli:  “Mama told me get in here”

*sighs* I hope she isn’t going on about the Llama people again.  There’s no such thing, babydoll.

Uli:  *giggles* ” I hide!”


I wonder what Gertie is telling Uli to hide from until I scroll to the front of the house and see our old “friend” has returned.

Creeper Mailman:  “I can’t get to the window! Someone has put a giant shrub in the way!”

Hmmm…imagine that.  I wonder who it could have been?  *evil laugh*

Creeper Mailman: “You’re cramping my style here!”

Oh, get out of here!  Go spy on the dude next door.  You two can take turns out-creeping each other.

At least Gertie was right to tell Uli to hide.  This guy is worse than paparazzi!


Gertrude has been in a huff for days, and it seems to be getting worse.  Then this happens.

Gertie:  “I knew it!”  *rolls wish to have baby*

Another little Hurkyferd!  And we haven’t even seen what little Gus looks like beyond being a cocoon infant.

Gertie:  “Me n Opus made up last night.”

I see that!

Gertie:  “And when I say night, I mean ALLLLLLLLLLL night.”  *smacks ass*

What did we say about TMI, Gertrude!  Family show, family show.  Oh, all right – let’s go with PG-13, then okay?

Gertie: *rolls wish to have girl*  “I want to name her Urethra.  Like Aretha Franklin but with a “U”, get it?  Aretha is the original Diva.”

Gertie, don’t you know what Urethra means?

Gertie:  “Pssht. I made it up.”  *flips hair*

Whatever you say, I’m just glad you and Opus made up.


Poor Gertie is still stuck fixing all the things in the house that need fixing.  Which is pretty much everything.

Gertie:  “Oh my aching baaaaaaack.”

I’m sorry you just spent 3 hours fixing the shower, sink AND toilet, Gertie.

Gertie:  “You know, I don’t think I’ve even puked once with this pregnancy, but Lord Plumbob be if my back ain’t going to kill me.”

Hmm…..could it be that your maternity footwear seems to be a pair of white spike heels?  Get some sensible shoes, woman!

Gertie:  “I won’t sacrifice my fashion.  NOT an option.”

Then don’t grumble about your back.  I may be a woman and may sympathize with you, but if I wore heels for work while pregnant, I would know better than to complain!


The next day is a big one in the Hurkyferd house!

Gertie:  “Yay!  My little baby boy is growing up today!  Soon as I get him potty trained I’ll be done with diapers!”

Well, seeing as you are cooking another baby, that isn’t true at all.

Gertie:  “Hush up now, let me have my fantasy!”

Opus: *rolls wish for girl*  I can’t wait for the new baby, Gert!  Now, let’s blow out your candles baby Gus!”

Opus:  *blows*

Gus:  *gets mouth full of daddy’s stinky armpit*

Yeah, we might be looking at some therapy bills after that one.

Gus:  *Goo-goo-gaa-gaa?”

Well from this angle, ignoring the ridiculous hair he’s grown into, he looks normal.  I see Gertie’s hair color and once again, Opus’ skin tone.

Let’s take a REAL look, shall we?

Gus:  “Goo-goo-gaa-gaa!”

Whoa.  That is a crazy looking kid!  He might be a mix, although I am thinking he might be a complete clone of his dad, but with Gertrude’s hair color.  Sorry for your gene pool, little dude.

Gus: *giggles*

You know what they say, ignorance is bliss.  Hopefully the next little Hurkyferd will be a girl because both Gertie and Opus have girl wishes locked in right now.


After the festivities are over, once again Opus gets sent out in search of someone to help him with Celebrity points.   At one bar (sorry, forgot the name) he runs into none other than the gorgeous Bryce Savage.

Opus:  “And then the conductor said, where do you think I keep my trombone?”

Bryce:  *laughs* “You are one funny dude, man.  I can’t believe we’ve never met before. “

Opus:  “Um, no we did meet.  At Anabelle Gooder’s party a couple months back.”

Bryce:  “Not me bud, sorry.  I’ve never set foot in the Gooder house.  I don’t like Mr. Gooder.  He creeps me out.”

Opus: “I stood right next to you while you watched TV in on of the upstairs bedrooms!”

Bryce:  “Dude, I’m telling you wasn’t me.”

Opus:  “That is so strange.  So was that entire party, actually.  I felt like someone spiked the smoothies or something.”  *laughs*  “There was this scary looking doll in the room you were in.  Come to think of it, you *did* seem really out of it.”

Bryce:  “….”



Gertrude finally starts rolling some Gus-related wishes.  She’s great with the kids, but not so great at rolling the kid wishes.  I’m super excited for the pregnancy ones, though.  Both Gertie AND Opus have wishes “to have a child” and “to have a girl”.  Lots-o-LTR points!

Gertie: “Say ‘picture’, Gus.”

Gus:  *stares*

Keep trying, he’ll get it!  He’s a Genius after all.

Gertie: “Can you say ‘photographic evidence of Llama people and the secret society they belong to that is trying to take over the world’ ?”

Gus: *stares*

Me: *stares*

Gertie:  “Can you say ‘MONEY’ ?”

Gus:  “Money!”

Gertie: “That’s my little man.  And you say that word to Daddy when he gets home tonight because we need some MONEY so we can move into a bigger house with working plumbing so mama doesn’t have to fix everything anymore!”

Gus:  “Dada!  Dada money!” *giggles*

Ah, just what Opus needs.  His young toddler son pressuring him to get a raise on top of his regular job stress!


Even if she complains, Gertrude has a good life.  She spends her days with her little ones and her garden.

Uli:  *sings softly to Ukelele*

Gus: *shoves xylophone hammer in his mouth*  “Tastes wike trees!”

Gertie:  “Why am I wearing this outfit?  I want my high heels back!”

Sorry Gertrude, you need to think about function over form right now.

Gertie:  *glares*

Gus: “Where’s me dolly?  Gus want dolly too!”

You don’t have one, thankfully. One IF is enough in an ISBI house.

Uli:  “I wuv you Uk-a-way-wee!”

Gus:  *shoves xylophone hammer back in mouth*  “Still tastes wike Tree!”


And on that fine note, we’ll end this episode.  Next time – will our expectant mother get the girl she so wants? What will Uli look like as a child?  Will the creepy doll take over the world?  Come back and find out the answers to these gripping questions, and much more!

Thanks for reading – please feel free to leave me a note!



Babies Born: 2 = 10 points

Total Points = 10


Chapter 0.6 – Party of Assorted Terrors

We now join the following program, already in progress!  🙂  Welcome back to the Hurkyferd Prettacy  Last time Opus and Gertie hit the town, we had some Uli toddler spam and Uli learned some skills.  We left Opus stuck in the side yard at his boss’ mansion – on his way to a work party.  Stick around, we have an extra-large update going on.  Supersize me!


Its been an hour since Opus arrived at the party – has he made it inside yet?

Opus:  *Hmmm…I can’t go out there with this nasty zit going on.  Let me just take care of it right quick*

Opus!  Its been an hour!  Go on and join the party.

Opus:  “Maybe I should head on back home and use some of Gertie’s pork rind and mayonnaise facial scrub.”

If you’ve been putting that on your face, I’m surprised you haven’t grown an extra head!  No wonder you are breaking out.  Now get out of the bathroom!

Opus: “At least I’m in the house, right?”

Opus. Get out there now….townie Sim parties don’t last very long.


Opus rolls a Wish as he works his way through the Gooder mansion in the Starlight Shores hills.  It is to mooch a few Simoleons off his boss and Party hostess Anabelle Gooder.

Opus: “Lookit this house!”  *gets stars in eyes*  “That chimney back there is big enough to crawl in!  Anaballe can afford to loan me a few Simoleons!”

Opus, I don’t think it is smart to ask your BOSS for money.  Especially seeing as this is the very first time she’s graciously invited you into her home.

Opus:  “Oh my good gravy, look at that chandelier!  You think that is made of real diamonds?”

Opus, Opus, Opus.

Opus:  “You think this is one of those fireplaces I can transport through like on Harry Potter?”

Sure. Go ahead and try it out.

Opus:  *wipes soot of pants*  “Okay, that’s it.  I need a raise.  If she’s rolling in the dough like this, I need a cut of this action.”  *rolls wish to mooch a large amount of Simoleons off Anabelle*

Well, we now have two Wishes locked in to beg for money from your boss,  the party has been going on for 2 1/2 hours already and we haven’t seen one other Sim in the entire house.  Sounds like a winner of an evening to me! *rolls eyes*


Opus is wandering this huge house looking for his boss – or any other live being – when he finally runs into someone.

Ernesto Gonzalez:  ” ‘Sup, man.”

Opus: “Hello there.  Hold up – do you wind if I do something really quick?”

Ernesto: “Wait…W-what?”

Opus:  “Ah, much better. “

Ernesto:  “WTH happened to my hat?”

Opus: “I have no idea what you are referring to sir”

*whistles and looks innocent*  Me either, Opus.  Let’s go find the hostess, shall we?


Opus wanders into another one of the many rooms upstairs and finds this guy being hypnotized watching TV all by himself.

Bryce Savage:  “The Doll is watching.  The Doll knows all.”

Okay, he seems a bit strange BUT he’s the first gorgeous Sim I’ve encountered in Starlight Shores.  Too bad he’ll probably be a grandpa by the time Uli is old enough to marry him.

Opus: “What?  Are you talking about my BABY daughter?”

I have no idea what you mean.  *MUST HAVE BRYCE SAVAGE’s GENES!*

Bryce Savage:  “All hail the Doll.  All must bow to the Doll… not resist.”

The hell?

I then scroll around the room and find this doll watching Bryce watch TV.

Creepy Doll:  “Look into my eyes so that I can steal your soul.”


Bryce savage:  “All hail the Doll.”

Creepy Doll:  “Give me your soul!”

Holy moly, where did that doll come from??

Creepy Doll:  “I WILL EAT YOUR SOUL!!!!!!”

Creepy doll is creepy.   Thanks for the nightmares, EA!


Shaking off the strange scene, Opus finally stumbles upon what I assume is Anabelle’s husband in the kitchen, working through his own nightmares apparently.

Mr. Gooder:  “My wife made hot dogs……”

Yes, those are hot dogs.

Mr. Gooder:  “But she never makes hot dogs for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!”  *stares*

What is going on in this house?  Did someone drug the food?  Spike the punch?  Maybe Opus was on to something when he got stuck in the yard.  Sheesh!


Spooked out of the kitchen, Opus is relieved (as am I) to finally find his hostess Anabelle.

Opus:  “Anabelle!  Thank you for inviting me. You have a lovely home.”

Oh, that was nice Opus.  Way to make an impression!  Good job.

Opus: “Now will you make me some nachos?”


Mr. Gooder:  “Wait, what?  Now she’s making nachos?”

Anabelle:  “Opus, you’re so funny!  You crack me up!”

Random Blonde Dude:  *WTH is up with that guys suit?  WTH is up with that guys FACE?*


Before I can have Opus ask to mooch some money, Anabelle takes off into the bathroom.  Then she goes into the kitchen and makes two more servings of hot dogs  and burns a pan of mac n cheese (I kid you not).  This is now 4 hours into the party.   Opus gets bored and wanders off.

Opus:  “I don’t think I like this pool.”

Why not?

Opus:  “Well, I can’t put my finger on it. Its nice and big, the water is warm and it looks nice in the moonlight.  But I just feel so heavy, I can barely swim!”

Maybe its all that soaking wet polyester you are swimming in?

Opus:  “But I always swim in my formal leisure suit!  Doesn’t everyone?”‘

I got nothing.


I track Anabelle down again.

Anabelle Gooder:  “What? I need to make more hot dogs.”

But you already have three servings in the kitchen.  AND an unfilled buffet table sitting in one of your dining rooms.  AND a burned pan of mac n cheese.  And there’s really no one left at this “party” besides Opus.

Anabelle:  “Your point?”

Can you stay in one place for a few minutes?  kthxbyebye


Annabelle:  “Opus, I am so excited!  I got another new car!”

Opus: “How nice for you Anabelle.”

Annabelle:  “Of course, that makes 17 cars I now own.  I’ll be sick of it in a matter of months.  But that’s alright, I’ll just run out and get another one.”

Opus:  “That reminds me -“

Opus: “Can I bum a few Simoleons off you?”

Holding breath…..

Anabelle: “Of course!”


Annabelle:  “Here’s one Simoleon.”


Opus:  “Er – can I bum a LOT of Simoleons off you?”

Annabelle: “Of course!  Here’s TEN Simoloens.”

Ten?  I figured a lot would be like 100 but I won’t complain.  At least she was a good sport about it.  And now that we’ve finally fulfilled those two Wishes, we can leave this party of assorted terrors and go home!


The next morning…

Gertie:  “Hey, I feel funny.  Wha – oh!  I’m pregnant!”

Yes, Gertrude we already know that.  You just popped some more.

Gertie:  “I will have you baby and I will name you Trashcan!”

No, that’s a horrible name. Besides, all the kids this Generation need to have “U” in their names.

Gertie:  “GarbUge?”


A lazy Sunday at the Hurkyferds.  Opus is still recovering from the party while Gertie gardens and Uli skills.

Uli: “Me wike book!”

Awwwww….she’s so cute to me now.  I hardly see the uggers anymore!

Uli:  “Mama pick apples.  Apples are wed!”

That’s right princess, apples are red!  Uli is the best little toddler, I must say.  She never cries and even though she has an IF, she gravitates to the skilling toys and books I leave out for her.  For my first non-playable toddler, I have to say it isn’t as hard as I thought it would be.  Either that, or she is that awesome!


Gertie stops gardening to gather some more space rocks and gems.  Which we sell for almost 800 Simoleons!

Gertie:  “That’s right.  WHO’S the best damn rock collector this side of Sunset Valley?”  *flips hair*

You’re pretty spry for someone who’s almost ready to pop!

Gertie:  “I’m pretty spry for someone who is FABULOUS.  Hrmph  Popping don’t have nothing to do with it!”

That’s my diva.


Later that night….

Gertie: *hops out of bed*  “OMG, that’s some wicked, wicked heartburn.”

Gertrude, I don’t think that is heartburn.

Gertie:  “I know my own body.  I just need to run around the yard a bit.”

Nope.  You’re in labor.

Gertie:  “Okay, maybe you’re right.”  *huffs* “This feels like labor.  I’m never going to be a 5-star chef if I keep having kids!”

Not the time to be worrying about your LTW, dear.

Note:  Notice the head in the lower left-hand corner?  That is the babysitter I called to watch Uli while Opus and Gertie go to the hospital.  Go take care of Uli for goodness sake! You aren’t helping anything screaming and flailing your arms around.


Off to the hospital they go.

Gertie:  “I’m tired, I’m hungry, I need a shower and my uterus hurts.”

Opus:  “Just think Gert, we’re on our way to meet our new baby!”

Gertie:  *glares*

Opus, its probably best you just smile and nod and keep quiet.

Note the giant YELLOW Plumbob…I’m nothing if not consistent.  That is two-for-two pregnant mama yellows for me! :/


A little while later.

Opus: “It’s a boy!!! Does he look like me?”

Gertie:  “I’m tired, I’m hungry, I need a shower and my uterus STILL hurts.”

Opus never entered the hospital for some reason, hence Gertie’s stinky attitude.

Opus:  “Tell everyone about our new son!”  *wipes tear*

Gertie:  Well, since no one else was with me, I named him Gus Hurkyferd.  He is so smart, I think he might be a Genius.  And I can tell just by looking at him he is going to be Artistic, like my Uncle Dusty.  I can’t wait to get him to make me a toilet-bowl flower planter!  Now, can we just go home please.”

Opus: “I’ll make it up to you Gertrude.  I don’t know what happened.  I couldn’t get in the door for some reason.”

Gertie: *ignores*

Trouble in paradise?  Or just pregnancy hormones in overdrive?


Tune in next time to see if Gertie forgives Opus, how little Uli does with her hew baby brother and more shenanigans!  Thanks for reading and, as always, please feel free to leave me a note.


Babies Born: 2 = 10 points

Total Points = 10 (w00t!)


Chapter 0.5 – The Nothing Spectacular!

Hello hello hello!  You’ve clicked your way onto Chapter 0.5 of the Hurkyferd Prettacy.  Last time Opus finally got a promotion, Gertie met a neighbor and Uli became a toddler.  Let’s see what our little family is up to now.


Opus decides to surprise Gertrude.

Opus:  “Ta-da!  Happy Anniversary, Gertrude!   A dozen red roses for the love of my life.  Thank you for taking care of our beautiful daughter, and thank you for bringing her into the world”  *wipes tear*

Gertrude: “Oh, they are nice!”  *WTH, It’s our anniversary – I wanted diamonds and shiny things!*

Gertie!  I heard/see that thought….Opus is practically in tears over there and you are grumbling about not getting diamonds?  You two still have hardly any money.  And he’s pouring his heart out.

Gertie:  “I deserve it!”

Opus:  *is clueless*  “Of course you deserve that bouquet!” 

Good grief!


I get a notification there is a performance going on.  I just installed Showtime at the start of this Legacy, so I am excited to see this as I have not yet had the chance.  Perfect timing!  I send Opus and Gertrude off on their date after the babysitter shows up.

Opus:  “Yeah, Dawg!  This is the best thing I’ve ever seen!”

Really?  I can’t wait to see what it is!  Wait – where is Gertrude?

Opus:  “Shhhh!  The show!”

Opus!  Where’s Gertie?

Opus:  “Oh, we took separate cabs.  Thought it would be more fun that way.  We can pretend we don’t know one another and pick each other up at the bar later.   Its a game we play called ‘Strangers at the Bar’  Last time we played we almost got arrested for public nudity!”

Leaves a bad taste in my mouth, too Simba.  Yech!


When she finally makes it, Gertrude joins her husband. (they really took two cabs…lol crazy Sims)

Gertie:  “OMG Opus, its like nothing I’ve ever seen before!”

Opus: “My life is changed forever!”

Here is what they were watching (oh you know you want to know!)

Absolutely NOTHING!  :/   Unless you call some confetti and shiny stage lights a show.  And notice Gertie tore herself away long enough to turn around and boo some random townie Sim she’s never met before.  This was before she spent 10 minutes on stage talking to to the lighting panel.

These two, I swear!


After tearing themselves away from The Nothing Spectacular, Opus invites Gertie to join him doing one of the things he loves most.

Gertie:  *sings*  “You’re the one thing”

Opus:  *sings* “I can’t get enough of”

Gertie:   *sings* “So I’ll tell you something”

Both:  * sing together* “This could be love, because…I’ve had the time of my liiiiife no I’ve never felt this way before…”

Ah, young love.  Best served with silly little love songs from Dirty Dancing!  And I am thinking this is a cute moment until I scroll around and I see they’ve cleared out the entire venue with their howler monkey screeches. Niiiiiiiiice!!


After a very successful date (including several Wishes filled!), the next morning Gertie does something I have NEVER had a Sim do yet.

Gertie:  “I feel so free!”

Gertrude!  There is a child to think of here, not to mention the Plumbob camera!

Gertie: “But it is so hot outside and we have no air condition in this house!”

Put some clothes on, woman!


After I tell her to put on clothes, she suddenly changes into her bathing suit and then cancels the action to tend Garden.

Gertie:  “blarghblarghblargh”

Oh Gertie, I am sorry you don’t feel well. But *squee*!!  Babies! (sorry for the puke pic, every legacy needs one)

Gertie:  “I don’t know, I think I might have eaten something bad…”

Trust me on this one, I had to watch the awfulness that is the Hurkyferd Woohoo and I swear I heard the baby chimes.

Gertie:  “Opus and me, well our love is like a symphony under the sheets!  And we don’t have any windchimes.  They are a device used by the half-llama people to hypnotize us into submission.  We were talking about this last night in DERP chat.”



Gertie finishes heaving in time to make breakfast for herself and Opus.  And by make breakfast, I mean cut two hunks of birthday cake.

Gertie: *chompchompchomp*

Opus:  “I had fun last night.”  *wiggles eyebrows*  “YOU stole my heart like a masked bandit.”

Gertie:  *chompchompchomp*

Don’t you have some news for Opus, Gertrude?

Gertie: *chompchompchomp*

It’s no use, Snape, I agree.


Checking in with baby Uli, she joins her parents for the meal.

Uli:  *splashes fist in goopy goop*  “Yummy!”

Are you going to eat that, babycakes?

Uli: *nomnomnom*

There you go!  Now why doesn’t Sims 3 let you teach toddlers how to use utensils, hm?


Gertie goes out to garden and I get a notification that Opus has been invited to a party at his boss’ House. This is good news as he needs to do something to improve his work performance.  But first…

Opus: “Who’s my big girl?  Who is daddy’s growing girl?”

Uli:  *baby giggles*

Opus!  Did you just finish what I think you did?

Opus:  “I sure did!  Uli is now a true toddler!”

She knows how to walk!  And you had that wish locked in so that was a ton of LTR points!

Hellz yeah, we love the toddler skilling!


Out in the yard, Gertrude wraps up her garden work.

Gertrude: “I don’t feel good.”

You’re cooking another Hurkyferd!  A little nausea is worth it.  Uli looks too much like you so we need some more babies. Besides, you and Opus both have Wishes locked in to have a baby and to have a boy. Fun!

Gertie:  “I think I need to put my formal clothes on and run around so my tummy feels better.”

Why don’t you go teach Uli to talk?

Gertie:  “I said, I DON’T FEEL GOOD.”


After that madness, we’ll go inside for a little ugly-cute.

Uli: *baby giggles*

Ukelele: *OMG, I thought I was going to a human home….what are these people?  I want to go home*

Uli: *baby giggle*

Ukelele:  *Calling the mothership!  Abort the mission!  You’ve put me on the wrong planet.  Abort the mission!*

Sorry Ukelele, you are stuck here just like the rest of us!


Opus is on the way to Anabelle Gooder’s house.  She is his boss at the studio, second to the director.

Opus:  “Okay, Opus you can DO this.  Just walk in there an be confident.”

Little self pep-talk there, Opus?  Afraid you’re going to see the Director tonight?

Opus:  *spirals into full-out panic attack*  “OMG, you think the Director is going to be there?”

Why did I even open my mouth?

Opus:  “Oh,maybe I’ll just go home and hang out with the family.”

No, Opus you have to go.  Besides, you have a bunch of work-related Wishes we can knock out tonight.

Opus:  “B-b-b-b ut the Director?”  *gulps*

You’re not going to make this easy, are you?  I swear you have to have a hidden neurotic trait. Sheesh!  It’s a party!


And that is it for this time.  Next up – will Opus make it into the party or will he continue to be distracted by himself?  Will Gertie really be pregnant?  Tune in to find out!

Thank you for reading, and hey, feel free to leave me a note!



Babies Born: 1 = 5 points

Total Points = 5


Chapter 0.4 – One Olive at a Time

Hi There!  Chapter 0.4 of the Hurkeyferd Prettacy starts night now!  Last time, our first Generation 1 baby was born in the form of a bouncing baby girl named Uli.  Opus broke appliances and left them for Gertrude to fix, and the Creeper Mailman made another guest appearance.  On to the show – we gotta lotta things to cover!


Gertie and Opus get into a routine with their new little family.  Opus works, trying to get a promotion and Gertie stays home, watching her little garden grow and taking care of Uli’s needs.

Gertie:  “Its so lonely in the mornings.”  *sighs*  “I wish Opus and I could have breakfast together again like we did back in Twinbrook.”

But your life is so different now.  You have your sweet little Uli!  And Opus is trying hard to get his promotions.

Gertie:  “But I hate eating alone.  Opus used to tell me every morning how beautiful I was.  Even though I don’t need anyone to tell me that,  it was still nice to hear it.”

How about getting up before 10:30, then?  That might do the trick….

Gertie:  “Pshhhh.  I need my beauty sleep.  That isn’t even an option.”  *flips hair*

Diva, diva, diva.  Makes me think of this:

Gertie:  “ZOMG!  I sense a Llama somewhere!”  *spits out oatmeal*  “You remember about my membership in DERPS?  The whole reason I have this tattoo in honor of our most esteemed Snookie?  Remember the Dolphins Exterminating Really Pernicious Sims? Pernicious as in evil??”   *sighs*    “I don’t care for llamas on account of our belief in the half-llama people.  They are just waiting to take over, I know its true.”

I have no idea what you mean?  I don’t see any Llamas in the yard or anything. *snickers*

Gertie:  *suspiciously peeks out windows*  “Okay, I don’t see any either.  Which is a good thing because since Uli’s been born I haven’t had as much time to spend in the DERP chatroom.  We shouldn’t be talking about this on the show anyway.  Make sure you edit that out.”

Oh, I will. 😉


While I am torturing Gertrude with llamas, I hear the “happy” music and get the most amazing pop-up of this Prettacy thus far.

Opus:  “Who has two thumbs and just got a promotion?”  *points at self*  “Opus Hurkyferd, that’s who!”

Oh Opus!  I am so glad.  Maybe you’ll like this position a little more and won’t come home in the orange/red every day anymore?

Opus:  “And I got a raise AND a bonus.”  *rolls wish to buy a hot tub*

Opus, dear…you have a little under 1000 Simleons in the bank.  Bills are due and we’re going to have to get a bed for Uli at some point.

Opus:  “Well, you promised to shoot for 50% of our Wishes, right”

Good thing his wish panel is full!


Gertrude has the “Stir Crazy” moodlet so I decide to send her out into the neighborhood to meet some people. Opus has absolutely no celebrity points, which he now needs for his job, so I am hoping Gertrude can be-friend a celebrity and then Opus can meet them as well.

Gertrude: “Thanks for inviting me in.  I’m your neighbor from around the corner, Gertrude Hurkyferd.”

Stardust Woods: “Hello, I think I’ve seen you a few times. I am Stardust Woods.”  *oh my boolprop, this is that woman that gardens in her bikini. And what the name of all that is good and fashionable is she wearing now? Those colors, and the cutouts*   “Nice to meet you”

Fake, fake fake.  Finally, we meet someone who fits in a Hollywood-type town!

Gertie: “Stardust.  That’s a pretty name.  Anyone ever call you Dusty? I had an uncle named Dusty.  He liked to make planters out of old toilets.  Oh, they were the most gorgeous things!  Especially the ones with the wooden lids.  Can I call you Dusty?”

Startdust:  “No”  *how can I get her out of here*

Gertie:  “Maybe I can have him ship one to you.  it would look great in your front flower bed!”

Stardust: o___O


Despite starting with a couple of PERSON PERSON MINUS interactions, Stardust starts to warm up to Gertie.  Soon they are gossiping and giggling like a couple of teenage girls.

Gertie:  “Oh, we jest but that house next door to me is terrifying.  Seriously, the yard is filled with weeds and stacks of magazines.  I went inside once and that man has at least 11 televisions in there.  And a bunch of kids toys, but no kids or cribs or anything.  I wish he would move.”

Note:  This is totally 100% true.  I was in the game trying to add cribs and single beds to houses in town since I found out only one – ONE! – other house had a crib (need to make room for other families to have babies/children/teens so the Hurkyferd offspring have kids to grow up with) and hardly any had enough beds for more than two or three Sims.  Anyway – this house was the definition of creeper!  Tons of games and TVs in this crappy, rundown house.  There was probably 20 stacks of magazines and a bunch of kids toys – but no cribs and only one bedroom with a double bed.  And this single guy lived there.  It was just very very disturbing. What the heck was the person at EA thinking when they built that?  *shudders*

Stardust:  “Oh you mean crazy Dan Stubbs?  Yeah, we’ve tried all kinds of tactics to get him out of here.  But he’s lived there for ages.  I think, despite his terrifying house, he is harmless.”  *evil grin*  “But he’s bringing down home values so we’re still working on how to get him out of here.  I have a connection in the new mayor’s office so it’s only a matter of days.”

Way to be neighborly, Stardust!


Gertrude had a wish sitting in her Wish Panel forever, and since she and Stardust were hitting it off so well (they were already almost friends by this point), I decided to let her do it.

Gertie: “So anyway, like I was saying, one day I will be the most celebrated 5-Star Chef in all of Starlight Shores, if not the world!  Wouldn’t you agree?”

The wish was to “Request Compliment“.  Aaaaaaand this was Stardust’s reaction:


*rage rage rage*

Seriously, she completely lost it!  She raged at Gertie over and over and they got a huge PERSON PERSON MINUS.

Gertrude:  “Pshhh, gurl please.  Like I even care about your opinion.  You don’t even have any celebrity points.” *flips hair*  “I’m going back to my house now that the stir crazy moodlet is gone.  The people there know how appreciate me.”  *flounces out*

Way to tell her.  Geeze!  What is with the women in this town?  I need to add some normal Sims into the mix!


Gertie goes back home and makes Opus’ favorite meal as a celebration for his promotion and bonus.  Then she finally finishes a painting!

Gertie: “Oh that’s a thing of beauty.  I’m going to hang it on the wall!”

Nope.  We’re selling it. We need the money!  And we get a whopping 37 Simoleons.  We’ll take it!

Gertie:  *sniffs*  “My masterpiece!”

But now you can buy some new stuff.

Gertie:  “Let’s go to the spa!”  *rolls wish for $500 treatment at spa*

New stuff for Uli.

Gertie: *sighs*

That’s parenthood for you.  And it is worth it a million times over.

Gertie:  “I know, I know its true I would do anything for my sweet Uli. Its just, I used to get facials every week back in Twinbrook.  My pores are screaming for help!”

You’re cooking level 4 or 5 by now, whip something up in the kitchen. There’s all kinds of natural beauty treatments you can make.  I bet you could even use things from your garden.

Gertie:  *throws self on couch*  “Too much work.  I’m tired anyway”


The next morning is Friday and Opus scarfs down some bread and jam before work.

You think you can make it through work today without getting stressed out Opus?

Opus:  *laughs and bangs on table*  “That’s a funny joke.  Haa haaa haaaa”  *rolls wish to quit job*

:/  Opus, we can’t switch jobs, we need those LTR objects for future generations!

Opus:  FML…..

This is a family show Opus, family show!


What is this I see?  Do my eyes deceive me?

Gertie:  *gives camera side-eye*  “Don’t talk to me.  I need coffee and breakfast. But mostly breakfast”

Hey, I’m just shocked you are awake!  You normally don’t roll out of bed before 10:30.  Opus is still here – you can have breakfast together!

Gertie:  “Must.Have.Food!  I can feel my curves melting away.  I can’t lose my lovely curves.  Opus loves me like this.  He always pinches me when we -“

TMI Alert! No, no, no!  That is why we have pixelated showers and undercover woohoo, thankyuoverymuch.

Gertie:  “Hrph.  You just can’t handle my lusciousness.”


Opus and Gertrude don’t get to eat together as he needs to get ready for work.  And get his needs in the green so we can try YET AGAIN to make it through a day at the Plumbob Backlot without needing some serious Sim Prozac.

Opus:  “It’s the toothpicks!  They have formed together with the Pimentos and are plotting to take over the world!  One olive at a time!”

Opus – you and your crazy ranting.  Between you and Gertie, you certainly show your Insane trait more than she does.




Run Gertie Run!

Gertrude: *huffs and puffs*  “I’m going as fast as I can!”

We found a pretty sizable meteor behind the creepy neighbors yard, so I send Gertie off to grab it.  But Opus’ carpool is already here and he can’t be late.

Gertie:  “I know, I know.  Let me concentrate on getting over there!”

Plus, you can’t leave little baby Uli by herself.  We DON’T want a social worker visit!


Gertie makes it over to the meteor.

It’s huge!

Gertie:  “Yeah, I can fit that in my pocket.”

Oh how I wish I had the pockets and/or backpacks of a Sim.  Nothing like carrying around 437 pieces of produces, 17 books, 89 pounds of fresh fish, a sleeping bag, 67 paintings and the family car!  All with no strain on the back. *is jealous*


Now Gertrude has to make it back before Opus leaves the house.

Opus:  “Oh yeah, I look goooooood today.”  *clicks teeth*

Oh man, Gertie *just* made it back in time!

Gertie:  *gasping for breath*  “I….found….a…..giant…..meteor…….GASP!”

Opus:  “What’s that dear?  I was distracted by my reflection from 5 minutes ago in the bathroom.  Love you – see you after work.”

Gertie:  “I think I’m going to have a heart attack!”  *pant pant*

Maybe we should invest in a treadmill when we have the money, yes?

Gertie:  *still gasping* “Hey, that’s a low blow.  As I said earlier, I love my curves!  And so does my Opie.”

I’m not knocking your shape, trust – I have curves of my own.  Beauty (ahem) comes in all shapes and size.  I’m talking about a 1 minute jog making you feel like those pancakes you had for breakfast are going to be making a big comeback.  As in coming back to a porch floor near you!

Gertie: *breathes heavy*

Or you could cut back on the bacon-mayo sandwiches drizzled with peanut oil and spread with Crisco?

Gertie: “That’s an old family recipe.  And it is delicious!”  *goes to kitchen*  “I’m going to make one now.”

*sigh*  At least be a little more active, its good for you. Take Uli for a walk or something?


Opus leaves for work.

Opus:  “Thanks for picking me up, Wally.”

Wally: “No problem.  Shame about Larry, though.  I can’t believe he was arrested trying to shave the director’s cats!”

Opus:  *stares*  “What?  When?”

Wally:  “Oh, you didn’t know?  Just last night.  I saw it on the 10 o’clock news.  What a nutter!”

Opus: “Yeah…..what a nutter.”  *chokes*

The Sims in this town, I swear!


Gertie spends her day as she usually does.

Gertie:  *grumble grumble*  “Stupid freaking,  %$#5^ * toilet!  I fixed this darn thing yesterday.  TWICE!”

I know, I’m sorry.  Everything in this house breaks constantly.

Gertie:  “I want to get some new things – like a toilet that won’t break after every use!”

Yeah, that costs 1800 Simoleons.  You guys have like 800.

I know, Gertie, I know.  As soon as we can, we’ll upgrade things. But for now, you just have to have patience.  Besides, if you fix things enough, you should work up to being able to make it so that things are unbreakable!


Opus comes home from work with…a birthday cake!  But before we can get to our little birthday girl….

Opus:  “I hate that flipping director.” *mumbles under breath*

I know there is a Plumbob in this picture.  I did that on purpose.  Look at that thing!  It is red all because of his 4,432 negative moodlets – all related to work!  I swear he was at 100% when he left for work.  This is pretty much how he comes home

Opus: “I’m almost not surprised Larry snapped and broke into the director’s house.  He’s an evil, evil man.” *sighs*

Sorry Opus but you’re going to have to deal with it for now.  Maybe if we get you some celebrity points and make more friends amongst your co-workers, you’ll do better.


Finally!  It’s here!

Gertie:  “Blow out your candles little one!  You’re growing up today!”

Uli:  “Goo goo gaa gaa”  *punches her mama through the chest*

Gertie:  *ignores baby fist through chest*  “Mama will do it for you”  *blows out candle*

Opus: *out of picture*  “Woooo hoooo!  Go Uli!”


Soon the birthday twinklies begin.

Opus:  “Look at my little baby girl sitting up!  Go into the sparkles, little one!”

Uli:  “I can finally see the rest of my body.  OMG I don’t have any legs!”   O___O

Gertie:  “Okay, I’m bored.  And tired.  I’m going to lay down.”

Niiiiiice parenting there, Gertie.


The birthday twinklies complete the transformation!

Uli:  “I have legs!  And feet!  And hands!”

You always had hands, baby girl! 🙂  But alas, you also grew into bad hair and a ridiculous outfit (of course, wouldn’t be the Sims otherwise)

Opus:  “Must…have…..cake…..must…temper…stress….level”

Almost there, Opus.  We have one last thing to do this update



Uli Hurkyferd – the toddler!  Okay, so she isn’t that bad.  But you can see the genetics now!  She’s got daddy’s pale, clammy skin, mommy’s greenish/yellowish/brownish eyes, daddy’s strange muddy dark lilac/orange hair and mommy’s facial features.

Uli: “Goo goo gaa gaa!”

Happy birthday Uli!  I don’t know if you’ll be heir because I have a feeling you’re going to be a clone of your mama and I want a good blend.  But I dressed you in your favorite color and those little piggy tails look adorable on you!


That wraps up this Chapter/Episode!  Next time:  Gertie and Opus hit the town on a date (gotta fulfill some of those Wishes!), Opus attends a work party and Gertie gets to learning her skillz.   Will there be more babies?  Will the toilet stop breaking?  Tune in next time to the Hurkyferd Prettacy and find out!

Thanks for reading, and if you do, please leave me a message!

P.S.  I am also working on creating a Page of Sims Legacies/Blogs that I follow.  If you would like yours included, please leave me a note along with your URL and I’d be more than happy to check it out.  I *adore* reading Sims legacies!

See you next time 🙂



Babies Born: 1 = 5 points

Total Points = 5


Chapter 0.3 – Take a Chill Pill

Hi there and welcome back to the Hurkyferd Prettacy.  Last time Opus and Gertie both started their jobs.  However, Gertie only worked for a millisecond because she is pregnant with the first child of Generation 1.  And now, on to the show!


Gertie had already read one of the pregnancy books, and I had a Wish locked in for her to read a book about Handiness, so I sent her back to her current hang-out, the library.  But we aren’t there long when she suddenly walks behind the counter and cancels all the actions I assign to her.

Gertrude:  “OWWWWWW…”   *huffs and puffs*     “OWWWWWWW!  I think I pulled a tummy muscle getting up off that couch.”

No Gertie, you’re in labor!

Gertie:  “OWWWWWW”  *panics*  “No, I’m not ready.  In fact, I change my mind!  I’ll have a baby next year, okay?  Let’s just forget all about – OWWWWWWWW!!!!”

Aw Gertie, you’ll be fine!

Gertie:  “But Opus!  He’s still at work!  I can’t do this without him.  And I can’t do this on national television!”

*checks Opus’ location*  Nope, don’t worry.  He was on his way home and is now on his way to meet you at the hospital.  Which just happens to be right across the street.  And as far as birthing on National Television, why I can’t even see inside the hospital since it is Rabbit  Hole – I mean, there are no cameras allowed in the hospital so don’t worry.  Everything will be okay.

Gertie:  “What are you talking about rabbits for?  OMG, I think my water just broke.”  *jogs to hospital*

Jogging while in labor?  Call me impressed!


Gertie was a great pregnant Sim and when the baby box pops up, I am allowed to choose the traits.

Its’s a girl!

Gertie: *grumbles*  “Who just spent two hours moaning and then twirled around in a bunch of sparkles to give birth?  I wanted to announce her to my reality TV fans.”

I guess that is fair.  Here – you tell them all about her, deal?

Gertie:  “Fine.  I still think you stole my thunder, though.  But enough about that.  Everyone please welcome our beautiful daughter,  Uli Hurkyferd, into the world!  I just adore her already.  She is very Excitable and sleeps like a log.  I’d say she is a Heavy Sleeper, just like her mama.  Now, Opus Eugene Hurkyferd get on over here and hail a cab to take us home.  You can do something today besides stand around, right?  I am exhausted.  Come on!!”

Opus:  “Hey, I helped, too.  In fact, I did a lot!”  *pouts* “Geeze Louise Gertie, take a chill pill.”

Opus, Opus, Opus – my man. No matter how much time you spent yelling “push” or “twirl in the sparkles” or whatever a Sim yells when their wives are giving birth, you should just smile and nod to whatever she says in the first few days after she’s done bringing your child into the world.  Trust.

Gertie:  “What? The heckfire you helped!  If you call screaming and tearing your hair out helping.”  *long sigh*  “Just help us to the car.”

Gertie’s Plumbob is orange at this point.  I swear, 90% of the time one of my Sim females goes into labor, she is in the yellow already.  Oh well, it makes it more realistic, right?  You don’t exactly feel in tiptop physical shape right after having a baby.


Back home, Opus rolls a bunch of wishes for little Uli.  Gertie, on the other hand does not.  But she autonomously snuggles and plays with her new baby daughter, so I forgive her for the lack of newborn wishes.

Gertie:  “Look at my little Nooboo!  Who has a sweet little face?  Who has a nice warm blanky?  Who just ate a nice big green bottle?”  *bounce bounce bounce*

Uli:  *pukes*

Gertie:  “OMG!  It’s in my eyes!  It’s on my dress!  It’s in my HAIR! Opus, take her so I can take a shower, fluff my hair back up and lay down!  This Plumbob camera over my head is red and it is giving me a headache. Grr…I can’t have the viewers out there seeing me covered in baby vomit!”

Ah, there’s that Diva trait poking its head out.


Opus is happy to take Uli and blows through his newly promised Wishes in seconds flat.

Opus:  “Daddy knows you just puked so it’s safe for him to do this.”  *twirls Uli in air*

Uli:  *baby giggle*

Aw, look at that little smile.  She is so cute. But OMG, look at the back hair on Opus.  He is a good Sim and I know he’ll be a great daddy but ergh,,,he’s weird looking.


Back to Uli (ha! Back, get it? Because I was just commenting on Opus’ gnarly back hair)  Never mind my bad pun, let’s take a closer look:

Awwwww.  She looks like she got her dad’s complexion and her mom’s eyes, I think.  She is lovely but fortunately for us (since we’re looking for ugly right now), all Sim babies look the same except for skin tone and eye color.  We won’t really start to know what we have until she is a toddler.

Uli:  “Goo-goo, gaa-gaa”

I concur.


Opus is very proud of himself for being a new papa.

Opus: *leans over crib*  “Gitchee Gitchee-goo.  “Who loves his new snuggly-bear?  Who loves his little Uli-Booli?  Daddy loves her, that’s who”!  *struts around bedroom with shirt off*  “Yeah, I am a stud, alright!”

Oh Opus.  You so crazy.

Opus:  “Now it’s time to knock Gertie up again.”

Opus!  She still has a red Plumbob from giving birth, what – 2 Sim hours ago?  Plus she *just* laid down.  Let a girl have some rest, jeeze!


After he puts Uli down in the crib for bed, he heads over to the computer.  He needs to get his relationships up for his job so he chats with his co-worker and carpool buddy Larry.

OpusnGertieforever:  *typing*  “Ha ha ha Larry, that is too funny. 

LarryLuvsLadies: *typing back* “LULZ, ermegerd, Opus, I ttly thnk u shuld do it!

OpusnGertieforever: “What? Sorry, I don’t get all that hip computer lingo. We didn’t always have the internet back in Twinbook.  Or computers.  Or phone signals.

LarryLuvsLadies:  Oh, okay.  I guess I can spell everything out this time.  I was just telling you that you should totally do it!  I can even drive if you want.  And I have an industrial size tub of Nair we can use.  And some clippers”

??? What are you two talking about?

OpusnGertieforever: “Um, you were serious about me breaking into the director’s house and shaving all his cats?  That’s funny but I could never do that in real life.  I mean, they might get hurt or cold or something.

LarryLuvsLadies: Exactly! LULZ  And then you won’t have to de-lint his stuff every day.”

OpusnGertieforever: “No, I can’t do that. Seriously Larry.

LarryLuvsLadies: *long pause*  “Oh no, I was just kidding.  Really.  Um, I gotta go.  C u 2-morrow.

Computer: “LarryLuvsLadies has signed off”

Opus:  “Maybe I should carpool with someone else?  Now that I have spent more time with Larry, he seems a little ‘off'”

This coming from an Insane Sim.

Opus:  “That’s enough chatting for tonight anyway. I need to pay the bills and get the mail before I head to bed.  Man, Gertie’s snoring so loud maybe I should sleep on the couch.”

No no, someone needs to take care of Uli when she wakes up to be changed and fed tonight.  And since Gertie just birthed your child, maybe you could pull baby duty tonight and let Gertie sleep.


I scroll over to Uli  while Opus pays the bills and see she suddenly has something in her crib!

Uli:  “Zzzzzzzzzz”

Hey!  There’s an Invisible Friend in there!  Opus must have gotten it out of the mailbox when he paid the bills.  I named him Ukelele.  All the kids are going to have “U”s in their name this Generation.  Why?  “U” for ugly, of course!  I know he isn’t one of the kids, but we’ll go with the flow.

I just hope that we don’t have too many IFs.  That seems like it might be really hard to handle in an ISBI (since I cannot control anyone but my current Torch-Holder(s))  I know the IFs love nothing more than to stop kids from going into the bathroom, do homework or accomplish anything other than pillow-fighting and playing tag. And that is bad for me and my points!

Points!  I just remembered I get some for a baby!  My first points!

Oh, John.  you’re so adorable *fangirlsquee*


The next morning, after getting up with Uli, Opus stumbles around the house in an exhausted blur trying to get ready for work.

Opus:  “Good Gravy!  We’ve only lived here for a few months and I swear this flipping sink has exploded at least 14 times.

He’s right.  This sink has broken almost once a day since I started playing.  I would replace it if these poor schmoes had any extra money but like myself, they don’t. I feel for you Opus, I really do.

Opus:  “Well, my carpool comes soon but I need to continue on my Wish to make at least 5 friends so I’m off to chat and eat before I leave.

What about the sink?

Opus: “Gertrude’s real good with a wrench.  She’s been fixing the cheap sink, shower and toilet in the bathroom since we moved in.  If I do it, I could get a bruise or something.  I can’t risk it, just in case I get a speaking part or something.

They have makeup that covers up things like that.

Opus: *ignores*



While water gushes all over the kitchen floor, Opus powers up the PC and chats for a while.  When the carpool shows up, he scarfs down a quick breakfast.

Opus:  What’s wrong with this banana?  Why can’t I taste it?

Hey Opus, you’re doing it wrong!

Opus:  “Is this really a banana?  What if the half-llama people planted this here and it has a mind-reading chip in it? 

Its a real banana Opus, you just need to peel it first.  And aim for your mouth, not your nostril.


Later that morning…

Gertie:  “Rassinfrassin…#$$%$#@….f$%#*&^ sink.  Opus must have broke this earlier and he just left it like this.  these are real ‘faux’ hardwood Formica floors!  Doesn’t he know he can ruin them?  We can’t afford new floors.  *grumble grumble*

Gertie, you don’t know what “faux” means, do you :/

Gertie:  “Oh great, now the baby is up.  But look at that, chalk up another repair to me.  I may look killer in a dress but I can bang a wrench on a faucet like no one else.”


Gertrude takes good care of Uli.  Babies really only need food, clean nappies and some snuggles now and then.

Uli:  “Gaa  gaa, goo goo”

Gertie:  “You’re going to be such a looker when you grow up.  You’re getting so big, it will be your birthday before we know it!”

She is adorable.  I had to resist the urge to baby spam the post.  I just wish Sim babies had legs and were more interactive, like they were in Sims 2.


The next morning Gertrude is outside tending to her new little garden.  As she is working, she suddenly gets a new action in her queue.  “Shoo Peeping Sim”

Creeper Mailman:  “Yes!  No one will catch me today!” 

What the heck?  Don’t they do background checks at the Starlight Shores Post Office?  You better get outta here before Gertie comes after you.

Creeper Mailman:  “Good,  Then at least someone would be in the house for me to watch.”

Of course, as soon as Gertie starts jogging towards the front of the house, CM is long gone.

Gertie: “One day I will catch that freak, just you wait and see.  I know I am gorgeous and he probably can’t help himself, but I have little Uli to think about now.”


After finishing up tending to the weeds, Gertie decides to have a little fun. (Warning: She is in her bathing suit!)

Gertie:  *slaps ass*  “Mm mm mm, I love this bikini.  You can see all my body art!  I must say, I am smoking hot!  Good thing I have the sprinkler out here to cool me off.”

Oh Gertrude, you do not lack for self-esteem, that is for sure!

Gertie:  “I smell something stinky.  Maybe it is the fertilizer”

Either that or the waves of green stink coming off of you.  BTW – what is with Gardening and making Sims all stinky?  And have to go to the bathroom?  Sometimes I can’t even get through an entire “Tend Garden” session without them going completely RED in both Bladder and Hygiene.  I need the Steel Bladder lifetime reward for Gertie at some point.

And hey, no failures yet!  Go me!

On that positive note, I think we’ll end this chapter/episode.  Next up – will we get to see the genes finally – will Uli age to toddler?  And will there be more babies or will Gertie go back to work so this family can get out of the poorhouse?

Thanks for reading and please leave me a note!  See you next time.



Babies Born: 1 = 5 points

Total Points = 5


Chapter 0.2 – Creeper Mailman

Welcome back to the Hurkyferd Prettacy.  Last time, we met Opus and Gertrude Hurkyferd.  Our Legacy founders who will be doing their best to produce a, let’s say –  unfortunate looking Sim in Generation 0 so that when we truly start trying to improve the gene pool, it is as hard as possible.  Opus got a job at the Plumbob Pictures backlot, hopefully on his way to his LTW of becoming a Superstar Actor and Gertrude joined the Culinary career to work towards a LTW of 5-Star Chef.


When we left the young couple, they were snuggling on the bed after an interesting visit from the Starlight Shores Welcome Wagon.  The next morning, Gertrude hops out of bed before sunrise.

Gertie:  “Ooooh.  That Kirsten Law wasn’t kidding when she said she took the good stuff out of my basket.  I think she gave me a bunch of that e coli-laced lettuce or something.”  *stomach rumbles and churns* “Either that or it was that possum pie I had for breakfast back in Twinbrook before we hit the road.”


She suddenly takes off out the backdoor of the little house, running down the driveway.

Gertie: “Sometimes when my stomach feels like this, I run in my Formal clothes. I find the pain of having my feet jammed into high heels from the force of my own body weight being slammed repeatedly over and over takes my mind off the ache in my belly.”

Yeah, that’s one way to do it.  Another is to grab some antacids.


Gertie stops on the front porch.  Effectively having gone from one door to another.  And glitches her elbow through her “formal” dress before suddenly discovering quite the stench.  (Note:  There was nothing around her to make her do this.  I checked her inventory as well and nothing was stinky or spoiled.  In fact, I just had started this save file and this was truly only the second Sim morning I’d played the Hurkyferds)

Gertie:  “Urgh.  Boy does that slap you in the face! Truth be told,  I’ve got some serious gas issues going on right now.  Phew!  I could stink up a room faster than a bag of old shrimp.  Papa would be proud.  Back hone we used to try and stench each other right out of the house” .

Or Gertrude, you are perfect for reality TV.

Gertie:  “Don’t I already know it!  Besides, Mamaw always said, ‘the stronger the stink the better the meal’!  That means the meal was great.  Get it?”



By the time she gets inside and freshens up for the day, Opus has already grabbed a quick bowl of cereal and headed to his first day at work.  Gertie has to get her Cooking Skill up, so she makes herself some pancakes.

Gertie:  *pops left shoulder into impossible position*  “I have the best homemade pancake recipe.  It was Granny Jean’s, Opus’ grandmother’s recipe.  I have to ask you to turn off that camera now, due to it being top secret and all.”

Yeah, no.  Anyway, Gertie makes a huge batch of pancakes and even though it is only the second thing she’s ever cooked, she doesn’t burn them.  Gotta loooove those Natural Cooks.  And Now that I am writing this, I so am craving pancakes in a bad way. *drools on keyboard*

Because, really, who doesn’t love pancakes?

Aw, poor J.D.  No smiley face pancakes for him that day!

Back to our Legacy.


After making her pancakes, Gertie is eating when suddenly I see something pop into her queue.  I hover over it and it says “Shoo Peeping Sim”.  I was like “whaaaat”?  I scroll around the house to see this:

I didn’t catch a picture of it but he was just leaving the window!  I got him as he ran away, the coward.

Creeper Mailman: “Oh, I’m glad that scary orange lady didn’t catch me.  Hey, my breath blowing back in my face smells minty fresh.  Thanks, toothpaste!”

This town, I tell you.  It is going to drive me to move my legacy yet!


After breakfast, Gertie changes into her work outfit but then proceeds to sit down and read a book, ignoring the honking carpool sitting outside waiting to take her to her first day at the restaurant in the Starlight Shores Corporate Building.

Gertie: “Oh, this Shades of Grey novel is so naughty!  Its making me all flushed and tingly.  I can’t wait to get home from work tonight.  Opus and I are going to get all -“


Don’t you think you should be on your way to work?

Gertie:  “What?  Oh, no.  I still have 17 minutes.”

Yes, but you are a Sim.  It will take you 15 minutes just to put the book down and jog to the car.


Off she goes to start making this Legacy some Simleons, thank goodness.

Gertie:  “Aw, tiny baby in my belly.  I love you already.”

o_O  Gertie!  You only worked for like 5 Sim minutes.  Really, she walked into the building, I started to pan the camera away and thought I saw her come back out so I scrolled back over, and there she was!  Then she changed clothes and, well, that leaves us right here. She got paid $12 Simoleons.  That will buy what, half a steak?

Gertie: “Opus called and asked me to meet him at the Karaoke Bar down the street.  I can’t wait to tell him about the baby!  Plus, the restaurant told me I get maternity leave pay!”

Wow.  you only worked there for like, 2 seconds.  I wish real life was like that!


Gertie heads down to the Karaoke bar.  In true Sims style (ha, no pun intended) she is wearing some wonky looking nightgown and still has her strange work skully-cap hair.

Gertie:  “OMG, will you get this hat off my head?  I despise it. Its ruining my pouf and cramping my style.  In fact, I think it is trying to kill me.” *gives death stare to skully cap*  “I think this was made by those half Llama people. ”  *panics*    “Maybe it is reading my thoughts!”

Insane Sims, gotta love them!  *waves magic Master Controller Stylist wand*  There you go Gertie.


Meanwhile. Opus is singing away on the Karaoke stage with some random townie.  Actually, once I click on his Relationship Panel, I see it is one of his coworkers. But I forgot to write down her name.  *slaps own hand – bad Legacy Writer!*

Opus: “Don’t go breaking my heart…”

Co-Worker: “I couldn’t if I tried…”

Random Sim in Bar: “BOOO!! You suck!  Get off the stage!”

Sims are so rude sometimes.  *clicks on Random Rude Sim and gives him that horrible shaved hair with the patterns in it and a pair of overalls*  Mwahahaha!  Revenge is mine!  Now who else wants to insult my Legacy Founders?  Yeah, that’s what I thought.  I handled that dude, like a boss!


Gertie and Opus head upstairs and go into the Photo booth autonomously.  Their pics end up really cute:

It totally looks like Gertie is giving us the bird in the pic on the left- top left corner doesn’t it? Naughty Gertie!

I sent Opus to the bar to try and meet celebrities but no one had any celebrity points so I left them on high free-will and let them do what they wanted.  After the photo booth, they played pool for a while.

Gertie:  “Urgh.  I smell something.  I think that possum pie is coming back -“

No Gertrude! Not again. I have a limit of one bodily function joke per Legacy, thank you very much!


The next few days pass without anything major happening.  Opus goes to work and comes home with all the stress moodlets in the game.  No matter how high his Needs are when he goes to work, he is off the charts with stress each night when he returns.  This means he stays at the bottom of his career even though he’s gotten a few charisma points. Gah!

Opus:  “See Larry, I just can’t stand that director.  He’s got eleven cats and I just cannot handle another afternoon spent rolling the lint off his wardrobe.  Even his Plumbob has lint on it” *sighs*  “Oh flipflop, just talking about it I can feel myself starting to panic.  I’m so glad the day is over and I can go home and relax.”

Larry: “Opus, I just picked you up.  Its only 8:45 AM.  We haven’t even started work for the day.”

Opus:  *chokes*  “I need some coffee.”

Poor Opus.  it will get better, I promise!  (yeah, no it won’t, not for a looooong time, but I am getting ahead of myself)


Gertie spends her days fulfilling wishes and skilling up for when she goes back to work.  They do not have any money at all.  In fact, in order to buy the bare minimum for the baby, I had to sell some of their furniture from the house and take down a few inside walls.  But, that worked and they get a crib, highchair, potty, and both little skill toys for the baby.  Gertie has a good pregnancy.  She rolls wishes to read pregnancy books and to have Opus do the same.  So, off she goes to the library since we are broke and can’t drop $270 Simoleons , or whatever it is, on a book.

Gertie:  “I was excited to be pregnant until I started reading this book.  I mean, two hours of labor?  That sounds painful!”

Yeah, try 34 hours, then we’ll talk.

Gertie: O___o

Oh, to be a Sim.


Since they have money troubles, I send Gertie around town looking for seeds so Gertrude can start a garden in their little back yard.

Gertie:  “Should  I really be doing this?  I AM pregnant after all, remember Producer lady?  Seems like I should be somewhere with my feet propped up and Opus rubbing my bunions”

Ugh.  But yes, I know you are with child.  And there is no reason why you can’t garden.  It’s good for you.  Think of the fresh, organic food you’ll be feeding your child.  And the money we’ll be saving on food bills.

Gertie:  “Hmm. I guess.  But really, can I just go back to the library?  It has air-conditioner and nice fluffy couches!”

Nope.  Keep picking.  Bananas are filled with potassium, great for growing babies!


I send Opus to the karaoke bar again to try and meet some people to practice his charisma, fill some wishes and try and get a celebrity point.

Opus:  “Booo!  You suck!”

Opus Hurkyferd!  That is rude! I just gave that townie Sim a deliberately bad makeover for doing the same thing!

Opus: “Welll, it won’t be so easy with me, I mean I’ve got these natural good looks.  you could put anything on me and I would still look the same.”

I’d have to agree with the last part of that statement, yes.  XD


When I scroll back to Gertie, she is doing this:

Is that your picnic basket, because I don’t remember buying one.

Gertie:  “Heck no, these things are expensive!  Some couple laid this out, then went to use the port-a-potty so I decided just to help myself.”

Gertie!  You’re picnic-crashing!

Gertie:  “Doesn’t the watermelon look delicious?”

Way to dodge the issue, Gertie.


And that is all we have for this time.  Next up:  A baby!  Who will start Generation 1 of the Hurkyferd Prettacy?  Will he/she be our heir? Will Gertie ever go back to work?  Will Opus ever stop being a stressed-out mess at the end of the work day?  Join us again and find out.
Thanks for reading and hey,  leave me a comment if you do.  I’d love to  hear from you 🙂


Chapter 0.1 – Doohickey’s and Plumbobs

Here they are in all their glory. Meet Opus and Gertrude Hurkyferd.  Two crazy kids from the small town of Twinbook trying to make it as big stars in Starlight Shores  – the closest thing to Hollyweird in the Simverse.

Opus:  “Nomnomnomfacenom”

Gertrude: “Nonom.. Baby you’re the bandaid on my bleeding heart…nomnomfacenom”

Um, ew?  Okay guys, let’s break it up long enough for proper introductions, mkay?

Gertie: “Me first, me first!  I am the pretty one after all”  *bats nonexistent eyelashes* (I know they are nonexistent because I didn’t give her any.  What?  This is a Prettacy after all)

I picked her traits.

Gertie:  “OMG, is it starting, Opus?  I can’t believe it’s really starting!  I can’t believe we got our very own reality show on SimTV!”

Ohhhkay, well, sure that’s exactly what this is.  A reality show. And I’m your Producer and Host.

Gertie:  “Oh my good gravy, what the Hellman’s is that green doohickey above my hubby’s head?”

Gertie: “I’ll get it, Opus!  You just run for your life!”

No, no.  Don’t be afraid.  It’s called a Plumbob. A very special camera/microphone combo.  VERY advanced technology.  Don’t touch it!

Gertie:  “Hmph.  That ain’t no way to be talking to a reality STAR now is it, I outta give you a swift backhand.”  *fluffs hair*  “Neverminds you that, you like my tan?  I’ve been going to the spray tan parlor back in Twinbrook?  And using my at home tanners.  I’ve got four different ones I use three times a day and my own special one invented for me by my uncle Cletus.  He’s a scientist”

You don’t say?  Why, I’d never know it wasn’t a real tan unless you told me.  It looks so natural. You hardly notice the orange tint, really.  However, I’m having a hard time believing you have anyone in your family tree anywhere close to a scientist, but we’ll go with it.

Gertrude:  “I don’t like your attitude Producer lady.  I might just walk off this here lot before you even get a chance to air my story.  I AM the Snookie of Starlight Shores after all.  You DO know who Snookie is, right?”

*sigh* Unfortunately I know who Snookie is.  But I can proudly say I’ve never watched one millisecond of that train-wreck of a show I refuse to type the name of here lest some Googler somewhere find my blog – er – find this Reality Show that way.

Gertie: “Hey, I don’t like how you italicized that word, You’re weird.  As I was saying, Snookie is my TV IDOL. I got this tat between my twins to represent her.”

Twins?  I don’t even want to know.  You mean that pink dolphin on your chest?

Gertrude:  “Are you touched in the head?  Of course!  Ever’one knows that Snookie is a member of the DERPS….”. *sighs*  “The Dolphins Exterminating Really Pernicious Sims – we’re a secret society against secret societies!  My uncle Cletus, the genius, he taught me all about them growing up.  They fight evil.  I am a member.  I signed up online – this is our signal”  *strangles self*  “We do this to let each other know we’re on the level.”

Hmm..did anyone research the word DERP before you used that for your acronym?

Gertie: “You do know about the conspiracy of the tree-men and half-llama people, right?  They are made up of most of the rich folks and politicians.  They come from underground caves and they’re trying to control the world. Some of them are even celebrities in disguise.  Trying to send their evil messages in secret eye-blink codes and hairstyles n stuff.  I read it in my Daily True News magazine.”

Opus:  “Oh, Gertrude, don’t start with that Daily True News nonsense.”

Finally, a voice of reason.

Opus:  “We all know that it’s the Weekly Tales of the Weird that tells the real stories.”

I forgot, they both have the Insane trait this being an ISBI Prettacy.  That reminds me, we need to introduce our other co-founder, Opus Hurkyferd:

Opus:  “Look there Gertrude, we have our very own Character Cards.  I wonder if they can give me some of those to hand out when I go to auditions and the like.”

Speaking of auditions, don’t you two think it is about time you head off and apply for some jobs?  After the house and furniture, you only have about 200 Simoleons to your name.  And hey, we’re going to get the cameras rolling now so let’s keep the chitchat between yourselves and the crew (meaning ME) to a minimum.  You go on and do that magical stuff you do and we’ll just add the boring commentary.

Gertie:  *rolls wish to get job in cooking career*   (Her first wish!)

Gertie:  “I’m off to the Corporate Tower Restaurant – or whatever its called.  I’m going to be the chef!  Hey, Mr. CombOver cabbie, you’re driving a 5 Star Chef and Reality Star.  Do you think you could speed it up or use your sirens to get through traffic or something?’

Cabbie: *Holy Batman, Jeffrey, don’t make eye contact don’t make eye contact….I’ve never seen such a hideous creature.  Even ON reality TV*   “Um, I’m sorry m’am, I don’t have a siren.  I’m driving a cab not a police car”

Gertrude:  “Hurmph.  Don’t you M’AM me.  I’m the YA here. You aren’t fooling anyone by brushing those three extra-long hairs over the top of your head, you know.  By the way, you know where I can find a spray tan place around here?  A girl’s gotta keep her color up.  Plus, my husband?  He’s gonna be an Simmy Winning Actor one day.”

Gertie, you know you aren’t going to START your career as a 5-Star Chef, right?  That is your Lifetime Wish.  It is going to take years of hard work and dedication to get to the top.  And seeing as you don’t have a car, maybe you should be a bit more polite to the Starlight Shores cab drivers.

Gertie: *Ignores and runs inside building*  “I hope they give me one of those big white paper hats.  Opus said he wants me to wear it when we woohoo later”

TMI Alert!  TMI Alert!  This is (sort of) a family show, let’s keep the Woohoo details to ourselves, yes?

Meanwhile, Opus takes to the computer to see if any of the Film Studio’s are hiring.

Opus:  “My high school drama teacher moved out here halfway through my freshman year. Something about a nervous breakdown.  Anyway, he told me if I ever made it to Starlight Shores to look him up.  We’re friends on Simbook online and he just sent me a note – the studio he works for is hiring!

That’s great, is he a director or something?

Opus:  “Not yet.  Right now he is Silas Treehorn’s umbrella holder.  You know who Silas Treehorn is, right?  Only one of the TOP producers in Starlight Shores.

Umbrella Holder?

Opus: “Oh yes,  very prestigious job.  The sun shines almost 100% of the time out here.  It is very important to protect your skin from damaging rays. *panics*  DON’T tell Gertie I said that!  She just loves her tans – real or fake.  She doesn’t know this, but I switched  out one of her self-tanners with 50 SPF.  I do it all the time.  Don’t put this on the show!  Back to the umbrellas – you know, only peasants like us hold our own parasols.  With his hands free, Mr. Treehorn can answer texts, phone calls and sift through headshots – like mine.  Now, my interview is in an hour, I need to go prep myself.”

Opus uses the small cheap bathroom mirror to gussy up and practice Charisma.  It can’t hurt to have at least one skill point before he goes off to try to make a good impression.

Opus:  “Gertie got her job!  She isn’t too happy she didn’t get the chef position.  In fact, they laughed at her and handed her a mop.  I  told her to keep her chin up!  Everyone has to start somewhere.  Besides, they don’t realize she is a Natural Cook.  She may not have any Cooking skill points, but she’s been cooking for me back in Twinbrook since we were in high school.  She’ll knock ’em dead. Once they let her cook.”

Cabbie:  *What the heck is the deal with this dude?  I’m retired but my son called me earlier and told me he’d been traumatized by some crazy-looking broad earlier. What’s the world coming to?*  “Where to, sir?” *Rolls wish to bleach eyeballs*

Opus:  “Film Studio, please Mr. Cabdriver.  You may not know it, but you are transporting the future Superstar Actor of Starlight Shores.   Oh, and never mind the green floaty diamonds.  Those are just cameras.  We’re being filmed for a new reality show – The Hurkyferd Prettacy.  I know Gertie and I are lookers, Gertrude that’s my wife, but to have our own show announce it to the world?  Life is good, life is good.”

Aw, I like Opus.  He may be wonky looking but he seems to have a lot of heart. I like Gertie, too. It’s just that Diva trait that makes her hard to handle sometimes.

A few minutes later (because that’s all it takes as a Sim to get a Job.  You want to work here?  Great!  Just show up, enter the building and the job is yours!)
Opus emerges with thoughts of Simmy Awards dancing in his head.

Opus:  “I did it! They hired me!  I have to start as a Background Extra, but I get to be in productions right away! The told me I have a very interesting look.  I knew I would make it!  The pay isn’t much and I will have to run errands like fetching lunch and rolling the lint off the director’s clothes on a daily basis, but it doesn’t matter.  Plumbob Pictures will never be the same!  And, to put the cheery on top of this grand day that is like a giant ice cream sundae, they don’t mind me being in the Reality Show. “

Really?  you don’t say.

Opus:  “Yep, as long as I don’t bring the cameras to work inside the studio, it’s all good.  Golly, I can’t wait to call our friends and families back in Twinbrook.  Heck, I’m going to update my Simbook status as soon as I get home!”

Back at home, Gertrude has some visitors. Seems the local Welcome Wagon has shown up at their modest abode to greet the new couple to Starlight Shores.   SS Townies Edward Gooder, Javed Meir and Kirsten Law (yeah, I Master Controller’d her hair in the Stylist option.  *grins*  It’s going to be happening a lot as we go.  There are some EA hairstyles I just cannot tolerate and anyone who knows me knows I have a HUGE hair addiction. I cannot help it.  If I see a hair I like I MUST HAVE IT IN MY GAME!!)

Okay, sorry for the hair tangent.  As I was saying, Welcome Wagon showed up and Gertie was excited to have the chance to show off her new home and chat about her new job.  And show off her natural Fabulousness, of course!  Gotta love a Diva.

Lord help poor Edward Gooder, for he must be blind.  He Immediately starts flirting with Gertie while Kirsten and Javed chat by the door.

Edward:  “Hey baby, you look good in the unicorn tank top. I like the way I can see the outline of your muffin top through the thin, cheap fabric.”

Gertie: “What?  I’m flattered.  I know I am a magnetic beauty but, Mr. Gooder?  You know I am married.  I already told you.  Opus will be home now any minute.  Now excuse me while I go make some dinner for us all with those nice vegetables you brought me from the Farmer’s Market.”

Edward:  “Marriage, that’s just a piece of paper.  You’ll find plenty of people in this town who don’t really pay too much mind to marriage.  Now tell be Gertie, what’s your sign?”

Maybe I just should have started this Prettacy with Gertrude?  Damn, isn’t this Starlight Shores where the pretty and shallow come to play?  Poor Edward must be a Sims version of this guy:

A few seconds later, THIS happens:

Edward:  “Ta-Da!  Oh Gertie, you’re more beautiful than these fragrant blooms.  Please accept these as a token of my affection.”

Gertie:  “What the what?  First of all, where in the holy frog bottoms did you get those flowers from?  No – never mind, I don’t think I want to know.  But now you’ve gone too far.”

Person Person Minus!

Gertie shoos everyone over to their little couch to watch TV while she whips up a quick meal of Autumn Salad.  She overhears Kirsten cackling and pestering Edward about the flowers.  She doesn’t seem like a very nice person.

Gertie: *Hrmph,  Who does she think she is.  This is my house. If anyone is going to make fun of Edward, why that would be me.*

Food is served and Kirsten continues on her ranting.  This time about Gertie’s cooking.

Kirsten:  “Hm.  This salad takes like fish.  What kind is in here?”

Gertie: “What?  There’s no fish in here.  Its Autumn Salad. Don’t you Starlight Shores people know what’s in Autumn Salad?

Kirsten: *picks through food*  “Oh, yes I see now.  It must be these cheap bowls and flatware. Either that or that crappy set of appliances you have over there need a good cleaning.  Of course, I have a maid for that kind of thing.  But living in a shack – I mean a cottage like this, you wouldn’t need one of those.”

Gertie:  *gives Kirsten stink eye*  “Well, I don’t know about that.  We paid a pretty penny for this little house. And you’re really annoying me.”

Door opens and in steps Opus.

Gertie:  “And my husband won’t have that kind of talk about his woman.  Now excuse me while I go clean up. A real woman can take care of her family all by herself.  *rolls wish for butler*

Hahaaa haa Gertie.  Not going to happen.  You and Opus have like 200 Simoleons to your name and aren’t going to be making a lot of money.  Not for a long time, so let’s tuck that Butler wish deep in our pocket and save it for a rainy day.  A rainy day about 20 years from now, if ever.

While Opus meets their guests, Kirsten skulks around the house scaring the begeezus out of everyone.  Including the living room wall.

Kirsten:  “BlarghblarghBOO!”

No, not really.  She just decided to scare the living daylights out of the person in the house most annoyed with her at the moment.

Gertie: “OMG!  She nearly scared the tattoo right off of my chest.  Good gravy Kirsten, why can’t you settle down?”

Kirsten:  “Haahaa.  You losers think I am really here by my own choosing?  I only signed up for the Welcome Wagon for the freebies we get.  You know, the basket we brought you?  Well, I like to keep some of that for myself.  In fact, I always skim off the best stuff.  Enjoy your bruised bananas and wilted lettuce.”

Yikes!  She doesn’t even need to sneak up on anyone.  Look at that face.  Man, my Prettacy is in deep trouble if that woman is any sign of the genetics I can expect to see in Starlight Shores.

Gertie: “Ooh, I don’t like that woman.  If I had a rock right now she’s be in serious trouble.” *goes into stealth mode*


Kirsten: “Oh my good Plumbob!:”

Gertie: “Ah, the sweet taste of revenge.”

Opus: “Yeah, that’s my wife!”

After saying goodbye to their visitors, Gertie and Opus clean up the house and share their excitement for their new jobs, both starting the next day.

They snuggle on the bed and relax in the glow of their love.  Hey now you two – no babies yet!  Gertie needs to work a week or two so you can make some money.  You are pretty much broke, so we need two incomes.

Opus:  Yeah, well you can’t stop our love, even with that scary floating diamond-thingy.

And that wraps up our first post – I mean episode!  Not too bad a start for our young couple.  They both have jobs, they met some people (albeit two out of three of them were looney toons) and have settled into their new home.   Tune in next time to see what happens.  Will Opus get his job?  Will Gertie realize she really *isn’t* the chef?  Will there be babies despite their desperate need for money?

See you soon and thanks for reading!